Finding Dory Review

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger). And today I’m here with another of my reviews on disabilities in the media. Now, as my Third Anniversary Special was a bit UK-centred, and something hardly anyone knew, I decided to look at something more internationally well-known. Also, I’m taking a step back from Autism and focusing on disabilities in general. I see no better movie to do that with than Finding Dory (2016).

During the late 90s and early 2000s, Pixar was establishing themselves as one of the industry leaders in animated films. With their ground-breaking computer technology and stories that were both imaginative and relatable, every feature they released was a major success. One of their biggest hits during that period was Finding Nemo (2003); a story about an overprotective father (Marlin the clownfish), whose son (Nemo) is kidnapped by divers. Now he has to fight his way through the ocean to reach Syndey, Australia and save him. It’s not the most original concept ever. In fact, you could say it’s your typical run-of-the-mill rescue mission. But what it ended up becoming was something a lot more. Through bonds of friendship, life-threatening situations, and personal growth for both the father and son, it’s a story that shows just how the power of love can overcome any obstacle and bring families closer together.

The response to this film was outstanding. Not only did it win the Academy Award for Best Animated Feature in 2003, but it was the second highest grossing film of that year and became one of the best-selling DVDs of all time – with 40 million copies sold in just three years. The American Film Institute even named it the 10th Greatest Animated Film ever made, and, it was voted one of the Greatest Motion Pictures since 2000 by international critics. After more than a decade since its release, Finding Nemo continues to inspire audiences both young and old. And so in 2013, Pixar announced they’d be releasing a sequel. But how do you continue a story that was near-perfect and arguably didn’t need a follow-up? By focusing on one of its most beloved characters. The ever-forgetful Dory.

Voiced by Ellen DeGeneres, Dory is the regal blue tang who joins Marlin on his quest to find Nemo. Although she’s incredibly good-hearted and wants to help, it doesn’t take Marlin long to realise she comes with complications. You see, Dory has a disability – specifically short-term memory loss – which causes her to forget things almost instantly. Throughout the first film, her condition is mostly played for comedy or used to delay the journey somehow. But it’s not all bad. Some of her other abilities are very useful to Marlin. For one thing, she can read. Which allows them to work out where Nemo is. She also teaches Marlin to enjoy himself every once in a while and uses her charm to get other fish to help them. Additionally, her disability has its high points too. While travelling with Marlin, she remembers their destination thanks to her strong desire to help him. Also, towards the end, when it seems he and Nemo have missed each other, Dory is able to reunite them following a sudden spark in her memory. Through it all, though, she remains her lovable and entertaining self.

In Finding Dory, she becomes the main character. And we’re given answers to questions we never realised we needed. How did Dory learn to read? Where did she come from? And, most importantly, what happened to her parents? In this role reversal of the first film, she sets out to find her family with help from Marlin and Nemo. Along the way, her condition is explored more deeply, and the film provides a social commentary on disabilities as a whole. Now, obviously, I can’t speak for anyone who has short-term memory loss, since I don’t have the condition myself. But I am diagnosed with Autism, which is also a neurological disability. And, as far as representing those go, the film does an excellent job speaking to both the people diagnosed with them and their parents. How exactly? Let’s find out.

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The movie begins with a young Dory, learning a phrase from her parents – one that will help her if she ever gets lost. “Hi, I’m Dory, I suffer from short-term memory loss.” We then get our first glimpse of how the condition affects her. She can’t count to 10, she’s easily distracted by sand (because it’s squishy) and forgets her parents are pretending to be fish she’s never met.

Distraction is common for people with neurological disabilities. Things may look or sound more interesting than what we should be focusing on, and our brains get instinctively attracted to them. This can lead to learning difficulties, which is why those people need guidance and support in their early years.

Dory’s condition also poses risks to her wellbeing. We see she has to be careful not to swim near the undertow or its current might sweep her away. However, she forgets the danger and occasionally swims too close anyway. Her parents try teaching her a song to remember, but she gets distracted again and starts singing a different tune. It’s at this point she notices them looking worried and feels sorry.

What’s good about this scene is that Dory’s parents remain patient and reassuring. Even young children will understand they have problems and they might feel ashamed by them. It’s essential for parents to make sure their child isn’t discouraged and that they find engaging ways of teaching them – no matter how challenging it is.

We then cut to some time later, where Dory has somehow gotten lost. She remembers what her parents taught her to say, but she can’t remember how she lost them. Worse still, she keeps forgetting the fish who try to help her and wanders off again and again. She spends years wandering the ocean until she bumps into Marlin, setting off the events of the first film.

It can be a risky thing when a child gets lost. But it’s even more so when that child has a disability. In some cases, they get so invested in their own thoughts that they can’t comprehend what’s going on around them. I know this because it wasn’t long ago a child wandered off from a store where I work. They actually left the shop altogether and began walking down the high street with a busy road. Even when he was found, he didn’t respond to his mother’s calls or understand what he’d done wrong. Not all children are affected to this degree. But until they know better, it’s best never to let a child like this out of your sight. In Dory’s case, she was lucky not to have been eaten.

A year later, Dory is happily living next door to Marlin and Nemo. However, she keeps waking up too early and forgetting about their anemone’s stings. During a field trip to the stingray migration, words like “home” and “undertow” suddenly trigger suppressed memories in Dory’s mind; she remembers how she got lost and something called “the Jewel of Morro Bay, California.” In a frenzy, she swims for the edge of the reef.

Before I go on, I should say this: Dory continues having these flashbacks throughout the movie, and they gradually reveal what happened to her. Initially, they were meant to be part of the first film with Marlin – to show why he became so paranoid and overbearing. However, the idea was dropped in favour of the prologue because it would’ve diverted from the journey’s heart too much. The reason they work better here is they allow us to feel what it’s like having Dory’s condition. With each new memory, we learn crucial information which brings us closer to the story’s climax. In this sense, it’s as much our journey as it is her’s.

Dory makes it clear she doesn’t want to forget these memories. She has to find her family but knows she can’t do it alone. She needs Marlin and Nemo with her or else she’ll forget. On a side note, I really love it when disadvantaged people show this level of understanding towards their condition. It proves they can work around their own limitations and live independently.

Marlin is reluctant to leave the reef again. But seeing how much Dory misses her parents, as he did Nemo, he agrees to help her. This is a well-executed moment because it gives us some emotional, as well as nostalgic, connection to the first film. We then get another one in the next scene. We see Crush the sea turtle again! By the way, this movie does feature many returning characters (e.g. the seagulls, Mr Ray, and the Tank Gang), but they only play very minor roles, and more emphasis is given to the newer ones introduced – which I’ll get to in a minute.

Upon arriving in California, Dory has a flashback which reminds her of her parents’ names: Jenny and Charlie. Unfortunately, calling them attracts the attention of a monster squid. After nearly getting Nemo eaten, Marlin angrily tells Dory to wait somewhere and forget – since it’s what she does best. This is harsh and would definitely upset anyone with a disability. Essentially, it shows us how not to react in this situation. Marlin gets frustrated with Dory and berates her for not being able to do the simplest things. Even though it’s not always her fault. Saying something like this would just make her resent her condition and gravely affect her psyche. Compared to the earlier scene with Dory’s parents, it’s clear which way is better in handling challenging situations. Additionally, this moment begins a small development arc for Marlin. As Nemo points out, his father tends not to believe in the capabilities of disadvantaged creatures. He did so a lot with Nemo in the first film – given his son was born with a disfigured fin – and continues doing so with Dory, and later a mentally-handicapped bird named Becky. Eventually, he does realise the error of his ways and accepts these creatures have their own way of solving things.

Back onto the story, Dory is caught by marine biologists and taken into the Californian Marine Life Institute – aka “The Jewel of Morro Bay.” Inside, she comes across some colourful characters. There’s Hank the octopus, who’s a bit grouchy but has three good hearts, and two other disabled sea creatures: Destiny the whale shark, who’s near-sighted; and Bailey the beluga, who supposedly can’t use his echolocation after hitting his head. Having characters like this with physical disabilities shows the movie is appealing to all disabled audiences, not just those associated with memory loss. Additionally, they provide some alternate viewpoints on the subject. Destiny doesn’t like her disability because it makes her scared of bumping into things. Whereas Bailey could, unfortunately, represent someone trying to exploit their disability; it’s revealed later on he can use echolocation, he just let his injury prevent him from trying. Being disabled does make things challenging, there’s no doubt, but it should never be used as an excuse. I never let my Autism stop me from putting in my best writing effort.

After more flashbacks, Dory recalls it was Destiny who taught her to speak whale and her parents who made up the Just Keep Swimming song. She also remembers her dad telling her there’s always another way, which inspires her to reach the Open Ocean exhibit – where her parents are – by land. Thinking back to the beginning, when Dory was struggling to learn important lessons, these revelations prove it is possible to remember them over time – even with a neurological disability. It just takes persistence and creativity. In Dory’s case, she was able to memorise whale-speak through constant practice with Destiny, and, her parents embedded a catchy song in her head, which helped her grow up happy and determined. It’s moments like this when disabilities don’t seem all that bad. However, in contrast, the next scene presents some of the issues Dory still has with her’s.

While travelling to the Open Ocean exhibit (by stroller and sippy cup), Dory has to remember the route by following signs and giving Hank directions. She keeps repeating “follow the signs to [the] Open Ocean“, but even then she get’s distracted. Consequently, she makes Hank take a wrong turn and they end up way off track. He then exclaims her memory isn’t working and it’s probably how she lost her family in the first place. Again this is harsh, but it sets up for some essential character development.

While defending she didn’t ‘lose’ anyone, Dory and Hank end up in the touch pool. Which I will admit is made to feel very threatening from the perspective of a fish. Despite the risk of being crushed, Dory tells Hank he needs to keep on swimming, and soon he releases a cloud of ink which fends off the kids. With his life saved, Hank takes back what he said and warms up to Dory. In fact, when they eventually part ways, he says he’ll have a hard time forgetting her. Just as she says “I think I’m going to remember you” – which coming from her means a lot.

Inside the Open Ocean, Dory can’t find her parents. But she does notice some shells lying in the sand. She then remembers her parents used to leave a trail of them so she could find her way home. Following it, she comes to the place where she used to live. But her parents aren’t there either. Seeing it, however, does bring back her most significant memory. One night, a young Dory overheard her mother crying. She was worried that her daughter wouldn’t be able to live independently given the severity of her condition. Dory didn’t want to see her mother sad, so she went to get her a purple shell to cheer her up. Unfortunately, the one she chose was too close to the undertow, and the current swept her away.

How many parents have had this concern? How easy is it to think your child won’t survive in life because of their condition? What if your teaching methods are all in vain? I know my parents must’ve felt this way at some point. And so have millions of others. But the thing is, none of it’s true. History has shown that even the most severely disabled people can go on to live happy, normal lives and do incredible things. It’s not just me, famous people have overcome their limitations; Albert Einstein, Satoshi Tajiri, Steven Hawking and many more. What’s important is for parents not to give in to doubt. If they do, their child will just pick up on their concerns and lack any self-confidence. But if they stick to their teachings and remain calm and reassuring, everything will work out well in the end. If there’s one scene from Finding Dory worth watching, believe me, it’s this one.

Following her flashback, Dory learns that all the regal blue tangs have been taken into quarantine. The quickest way to get there is through the pipes, but she’s worried she’ll forget the directions she’s given – again, this is showing a clear understanding of her limitations. Unfortunately, she’s right. Within moments the directions get jumbled up in her head, she makes wrong turns and becomes hopelessly lost. Luckily another memory saves her. Using the pipes’ echo, she’s able to contact Destiny, and, with Bailey’s reawakened echolocation, the whale shark guides her to safety. But not before the latter reunites with Marlin and Nemo, who’ve been on their own misadventure to find her.

As the three travel down the pipes together, Dory wonders if her parents will really want to see her again. But Marlin tells her they’ll be overjoyed. Because parents will always love their children regardless of their disabilities. Which is an important thing to remember; no matter how challenging a child’s condition is, it’s simply a part of who they are. True parents will learn to accept this and live past it. Marlin knows Dory’s parents will also love who she is now. Because he admits that the time he’s spent with her has made him a better father. In fact, the way he and Nemo found her was by thinking: “What would Dory do?” She feels happier after hearing this, but Nemo is sad to realise they’ll have to say goodbye soon.

Arriving in quarantine, it doesn’t take the friends long to find the regal blue tangs’ tank. However, there’s shocking news: Jenny and Charlie went missing years ago. Apparently, they followed Dory down the pipes to try and find her but never came back. Believing her parents to be dead, Dory begins spacing out and loses all sense of what’s going on. It then goes from bad to worse as she’s lifted from the tank – leaving Marlin and Nemo trapped – gets dropped on the floor and then slips down a grating back into the ocean. Within seconds, she can’t remember what’s just happened and even forgets Marlin and Nemo.

This goes back to what I said about being heavily invested in your own thoughts. Dory is so distraught by her parents’ fate that she can’t register anything else. It’s another well-executed moment because everything is shown through Dory’s eyes, allowing us to feel how confused and unfocused she is.

At this point, Dory is terrified. And we’re scared for her since there’s a real chance she could end up wandering the ocean again. Fortunately, the one thing she does remember is “what would Dory do?” So, staying calm, she assesses her surroundings and makes decisions on where to go. First, she swims towards some kelp (since it’s better than open water); then some sand (because it’s squishy), then a shell, then another shell, then another. And then she realises there’s a whole trail of them. Following it, she comes to a sunken tyre with dozens of shell trails leading towards it. As she approaches, two figures emerge from the distance. It’s her parents! After a moment of stunned silence, Jenny and Charlie rush towards their daughter and embrace her lovingly. Dory is overjoyed as well. But then she starts crying. She apologises to her parents, saying she knows she’s got a problem, but can’t fix it; thoughts leave her head, ideas change, she even forgot about them, etc.

Never before have I ever seen a character so openly expressive about their condition. If the flashback with Dory’s mother was for the parents watching, this scene is definitely for the children.

Jenny and Charlie tell Dory not to be sorry. Because she found them! And they always knew she would. They escaped the institute and stayed in one place for years, collecting shells and making trails, because they always knew somehow she’d remember what they taught her. And she did. “You remembered in your own amazing Dory way,” Jenny says. This was the most powerful line in the whole movie for me. It speaks volumes about the true capabilities of disabled people and what they can achieve under the right influences.

When asked if she’s been alone all this time, Dory suddenly remembers Marlin and Nemo. She has to go back and save them or else they’ll be shipped off to Missouri with the regal blue tangs. With help from her parents and numerous other creatures – including Hank, Bailey and Destiny (who’ve all escaped the institute) – she comes up with a plan. At one point, she has to separate from her parents. But she tells them not to worry. Because even if she does forget, she knows she can find them again. After some crazy shenanigans, including hijacking a truck and crashing it into the sea, Marlin and Nemo are saved. And the other sea creatures can finally enjoy the real open ocean.

Sometime later, Dory is back on the reef with Marlin and Nemo. Her parents have moved there along with Hank, Bailey and Destiny. We see she still has problems with her memory, e.g. forgetting how to count and why she’s counting, but after thinking things through, she’s able to remember quickly. The final scene shows her enjoying the ocean view with Marlin and having one last flashback: her parents are proud she’s followed the shell trail home and say she can do anything if she puts her mind to it.

In conclusion, Finding Dory may not have been a sequel anyone asked for. But it was a surprising success nonetheless. With its unforgettable characters and highly relatable story, it’s little wonder why it became the second Pixar film to gross more than a billion dollars at the box office. I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: this movie is for everyone. Even if you’re not a fan of Pixar or animation, I’d recommend it if you’re associated with disabilities in any way (parent or child).

***

And that’s all I have to say for Finding Dory. I’m sorry this review took me a little longer to finish, but I hope you’ve enjoyed it. If you have any questions, please leave me a comment – I’ll be more than happy to answer them. And, as always, stay tuned.

(Image courtesy of https://www.amazon.ca/Finding-Dory-Blu-ray-DVD-Digital/dp/B01FJ4UGF0)

My Little Pony: Lesson Zero and Autism (Part 2)

(Continued from Part 1: https://georgeharvey2015.wordpress.com/2016/10/22/my-little-pony-lesson-zero-and-autism-part-1/)

From here onwards, the episode focuses on Twilight trying to cope with the stress of potentially missing her deadline. Many people go through this situation, of course. But it’s important to note how Twilight is reacting. And why. Because she thinks very highly of Celestia, she feels it’s necessary to push herself – if she’s not perfect, it’s not meeting her tutor’s standards. I had this same problem in university. Because I took Creative Writing at Greenwich, one of London’s top colleges, every assignment felt like it had to be precise or else I’d fail my course. This goes back to what I said before about problems feeling bigger than they actually are. No one expects perfection – not even royalty. But if you’re used to being a model pupil, it’s easy to stress over small details and imagine all the negative outcomes.

Thinking she’ll be sent back to magic kindergarten if she fails, Twilight decides to find a friendship problem and solve it by the end of the day. Unfortunately, she doesn’t have much luck. Every time she runs into one of her friends they look like they’re in trouble. But it turns out to be a misunderstanding, leaving her crushed.

Yes, Twilight is actually hoping her friends are suffering so she’ll have something to fix and write about. When you’re stressing over a deadline, it’s hard to concern yourself with anything else.

With no friendship problems in sight, Twilight curls up on a park bench trying to comfort herself. However, the pressure is clearly getting her. She’s stroking her tail, her mane is frazzled, she starts crying and arguing with herself (Gollum-style.) She even has hallucinations of younger ponies (fillies) laughing at her.

You might think this behaviour is a bit exaggerated or comical. But I can tell you, from personal experience, that it’s realistic. There were times in university when I’d curl up in fear. Or I’d cry and talk to my reflection. Sometimes I even had nervous twitches that made me throw up in the morning. The point is, stress can cause you to act the way Twilight does. And I’m glad Meghan McCarthy and the animators gave us such an accurate portrayal here.

Spike tells Twilight she needs to calm down because he’s worried about her. He suggests they go to the picnic so she can relax. But Twilight sees this as another chance to find a friendship problem.

Again, this is realistic behaviour from Twilight. When you have short deadlines, it feels like you can’t afford to take breaks. If you do, you’ll just have less time to finish your tasks, which makes the situation more stressful.

Arriving at the picnic, Twilight tells her friends she desperately needs their help. They seem eager to lend a hoof until she explains she’s late for an assignment. At which point, they brush off the problem and go back to their picnic. Twilight insists her whole life depends on this. But her friends just say she’s getting all worked up over nothing – some even laugh and call her a drama queen. This infuriates Twilight, and she runs off in frustration.

This is a very pivotal moment in the episode. Not only does it affect everything that happens afterwards, but it ultimately leads us to the moral of the story.

Also, this situation is something I feel very personal about.

To be fair, Twilight’s friends aren’t being hurtful on purpose – they do show regret after she runs off. But if I were in her position, I’d be mad too. There have been times when I’ve gone to people for help, and all they’ve done is tell me my problems aren’t worth stressing over. I  do understand why they say this. But it doesn’t do anything to help me, and I almost hate them for it.

It’s the same with Twilight.

Yes, she is overreacting – that much is obvious. But she wouldn’t be panicking if she didn’t feel she had a reason to. Her friends don’t see what’s so stressful because they’re not the ones with the problem. So they think the obvious solution is to stop worrying about it. But this is the worst thing you can say to somebody in Twilight’s predicament.

People do prefer not to feel negative emotions. But they can’t stop feeling how they are just because someone tells them to. If you were punched in the face, you wouldn’t forgive the person who did it just because they said it was a joke. You wouldn’t immediately cheer up if you were told your mother died. And you wouldn’t stop worrying about something just because another person said they would. Telling someone they’re overreacting, without offering a proper solution to their problem, just makes that person think you’re being insensitive. Or worse, poking fun at their misery. This is the sort of thing that ruins relationships.

Twilight’s friends don’t realise the severity of their actions – or lack of them. And it’s what leads us to the episode’s climax.

We cut back to Twilight, who’s watching the sun set from her bedroom. By this point, her mind has officially snapped, and she’s descending into madness.

Seriously, go on YouTube, type Crazy Twilight Sparkle and click the first video that comes up. This scene alone proves why My Little Pony isn’t just for girls anymore.

With seemingly no other option, Twilight decides if she can’t find a friendship problem, she’ll make one.

I’ve been through this scenario once too often; the pressure of meeting a deadline can be so overwhelming you resort to taking shortcuts. The stress means you can’t think straight and you’re so focused on finishing the task you don’t care if it’s done well or not.

Twilight goes outside, with a sadistic grin on her face (see image link below), and comes across Applebloom, Sweetiebelle and Scootaloo (the Cutie Mark Crusaders). She shows the fillies her Smarty Pants doll and gives it to them, hoping they’ll fight over it. When they don’t, she casts a “Want It/Need It” spell, which forces them to fight. Twilight tries to teach the girls about sharing but quickly realises the spell is too powerful. Then more ponies fall under her spell until nearly everyone in Ponyville is fighting over the doll. Twilight finds her friends and admits she messed up, just as the sun sets over the horizon.

By the way, I should mention the sun has been setting in a rather unique way. Along with a ‘ticking’ windmill, it’s been jolting across the sky like the hours on a clock face. I love how the animators did this because it emphasises how Twilight is feeling about her time pressure.

Just when it looks like things can’t get any worse, a voice cries out “TWILIGHT SPARKLE!” It’s Princess Celestia. She casts a spell which removes the enchantment from the doll, returning every pony to normal. She then approaches Twilight and says to meet her in the library. Believing she knows what this means, Twilight says a sad goodbye to her friends and walks away – it’s only then they realise how big Twilight’s problem might’ve been.

However, it turns out Celestia isn’t mad. She tells Twilight she’s a wonderful student, and she doesn’t need to get a letter from her every week to know that.

This is further proof that Twilight set the letter deadline herself. She was just pushing herself, unnecessarily, to impress her teacher.

Suddenly, Twilight’s friends burst in and beg Celestia not to punish her. They insist it was their fault for what happened because they didn’t take Twilight’s feelings seriously before. If they did, they could’ve done more to help her, and she wouldn’t have caused all the chaos.

I’m so glad Megan McCarthy included this scene. The episode could’ve ended with Twilight learning her lesson, and that would’ve been enough. But she makes it clear that Twilight wasn’t the only pony at fault. Her friends share equal blame for not taking the right course of action. To quote a line from an old Sonic Underground episode: “You’re part of the problem if you’re not helping solve them.”

Celestia seems impressed that every pony has learnt from the day’s experience. So she makes a deal with them. She’ll forget the fiasco if, from now on, all six of them write her letters on their lessons of friendship – when, and only when, they discover them.

This solution is perfect for two reasons: A) it takes some much-needed pressure off of Twilight, and B) it solves a problem many critics had with the first season. You see, because Twilight was the only pony who could write Celestia letters, she had to be shoehorned into every single episode – even when she wasn’t the primary focus. With this new set-up, however, the writers could keep the spotlight on other characters, without squeezing Twilight in if they didn’t need her.

Before Celestia leaves, Twilight finds out it was Spike who told her she was in trouble and needed some guidance.

I love how Spike was written in this episode. He’s the only character (other than Celestia) who did the right thing. Twilight was too busy panicking to contact the one pony who could’ve assured her nothing was wrong. So, like a true friend, he did it for her. It’s better to express your fears to the person you’re answering to rather than worrying about what they might say or think.

The episode ends with everyone working together to write Celestia a letter. Twilight has learnt not to let her fears get the better of her, or let a small problem turn into something bigger. Her friends have learnt it’s important to listen to others, and consider their feelings when they come to you with a problem. Spike tries writing how great he is and how he didn’t need to learn a lesson but realises he should cross it out. Everyone laughs as the screen fades to black.

*

Overall, Lesson Zero is one of my favourite Friendship is Magic episodes. There have been better ones since it aired like Magical Mystery Cure (S3, Ep13), Slice of Life (S5, Ep9) and Crusaders of the Lost Mark (S5, Ep18). But I enjoy how relatable it is.

I don’t think I would’ve done anything differently to Twilight in this episode. In fact, one of the lessons it teaches has had a profound impact on my writing.

When I first started this blog, I tried to write something for it every week. Unfortunately, this proved too stressful because I had other things going on in my life. And I couldn’t always come up with ideas. So I decided to take Princess Celestia’s advice. Now, like Twilight and her friends, I only write when there’s a significant topic I want to discuss, and when I’m able to devote enough time and effort to it. This has allowed me to produce much better content, with the quality and high standards that my readers deserve.

I could tell you more about what Lesson Zero has done for my life. But I can’t do it justice just by talking about it. If you have Autism, or you care for somebody with the condition, then I would seriously recommend giving this episode a watch. Who’s knows, you might like it so much you end up becoming a brony/pegasister yourself, and watch all six seasons of Friendship is Magic – plus the four Equestria Girls movies.

That’s all I have to say for now. I’m sorry it’s taken me forever to finish this post – it’ll probably be a while before there’s another one – but I try to make sure I have the right blend of quality and quantity in my work. If you have any questions, please leave me a comment. I’ll be happy to answer them. And, as always, stay tuned.

(Image courtesy of http://www.brony.com/brony-facts-faq/my-little-pony-cast/)

(Twilight’s sadistic grin: http://orig11.deviantart.net/8150/f/2012/193/1/9/twilight_sparkle___crazy_by_pyschedelicskooma-d56ymme.png)

College Years (Part 2)

 

When I first found out I’d been accepted onto the Professional Writing course, I felt really proud of myself.

My parents were proud, too. They’d been told for years that I’d never be able to attend College, because of the severity of my Autism. Even the people who diagnosed me thought it would be impossible. However, those same people thought I’d never attend public school either. Yet I spent 8 years at Hook Lane Primary – not in a private school.

My sister and I were the first in our family to attend College at 18, and I was eager to prove myself. But I knew getting into North (West) Kent was just the beginning.

My first real taste of College life came when I went to register my personal details at the campus. On that day I was both nervous and hopeful; nervous because I had to fill out important information about myself without any help, but hopeful because I’d be meeting my fellow students for the first time.

I’ve said before that my later years in Secondary School weren’t the best of my life. I felt depressed and isolated because I didn’t have many friends, and I rarely socialised with anybody. To me, College was about more than just improving my writing skills. I also saw it as an opportunity to make a fresh start. I really hoped that the course would allow me to make new friends – ones who I could relate to.

When I first met my fellow writing students I was a bit surprised. I’d forgotten College wasn’t just for Secondary School graduates, so I expected everyone to be the same age as me. But it turned out I was the youngest in a group that ranged from 18-year-olds to over 50s. This concerned me at first, because I thought it would cause social barriers. Fortunately, this wasn’t the case. Being a small group, it was a lot easier to get acquainted with everyone. And before long we were speaking to each other about our dreams and aspirations as if age didn’t matter.

Everyone had their own backgrounds, but one thing we all shared in common was a passion for writing. Over the next two years, we became a lot closer through helping each other with assignments. We even had our own Facebook page so we could always stay in touch. Having such a close bond proved to be very beneficial for all of us. There were times when someone would suffer personal problems and consider quitting the course, but everyone else would offer their support and convince that person otherwise.

Being a part of this small group proved especially beneficial to me and my social skills. In Secondary School I’d never been to a friend’s house or done anything with them outside a classroom. In College however, not only was I talking a lot more, I was meeting people for lunch, doing Secret Santas with them, attending birthdays, visiting friends houses to watch wrestling, etc.

But my friends weren’t the only ones that made College life more bearable. I also had my tutors.

In my first year, I had two tutors: Neil Nixon who taught ‘Creative Non-fiction’, ‘Research for Writers’, and other subjects on Mondays and Wednesdays; and Michael Ellis who taught ‘Forms of Writing’ on Thursdays.

Neil was an experienced author who’d published a book called ‘How to Get a Break as a Writer’ (2011). He taught me that there was more to being an author than just writing something and trying to find a publisher for it. You also had to find your own writer’s identity and obtain recognition from the right sorts of people (e.g. agents, charities, publishers, libraries, etc). It’s because of him that I discovered my writer’s identity was being an Autism advocate; by writing about my personal experiences with the condition, I could raise awareness of it’s effects and help make a difference in other people’s lives. It’s also what encouraged me to become a volunteer book-picker at the Dartford Library.

Mike Ellis was a bit different from Neil. He had experience in many fields of writing including books, screenplays and TV adverts. He taught me there always needs to be a strong meaning/metaphor behind your writing. Every line you write, or scene you show, has to contribute to a much deeper story than the one your audience sees/reads. For instance, the film ‘Misery’ (1990) might seem like another horror movie, but the screenplay actually explores the idea: ‘What if’ someone couldn’t trust their mother. Ever since then, I’ve always thought of ‘Implicit Messages’ to go along with my story ideas. I’ve also used other techniques such as ‘Internal Dynamics’ and ‘Motifs’, which have made my fiction writing a lot easier.

In the second year I was taught by two more tutors in addition to Mike and Neil. They were: Andy Sayers, who taught ‘Electronic Applications’, and Graham Gladin, who taught ‘The Art of the Novel’ – both on Tuesdays.

Andy was experienced in IT and occasionally hosted Miskin Radio – North Kent College’s radio station. From him, I learnt how new technology was changing the way writers got their work recognised (e.g. podcasts, blogs, social media, online articles, etc). I also learnt how different it was to write something you read to yourself and something you read aloud to other people. Almost every week my classmates and I would research the local news, write a script and then speak about it on Miskin Radio the next day. It’s partly thanks to Andy that I have this blog and why I’m so good with presentations / public speaking.

As for Graham, he taught me things the other tutors didn’t, like the workings of a graphic novel and how fictional accounts could have an impact on society. This encouraged me to continue my dream of becoming a novelist – my writer’s identity could be used in this field too.

One thing was for sure. Whether I had two tutors or four, I knew I could always rely on them. They understood my Autism caused me problems sometimes, so they were on hand to help me if I was struggling – having your tutor’s email address is always an advantage if you want to avoid feeling stress or pressure in College. All of my tutors were friendly and memorable in their own way. I especially remember Mike and Neil, because Mike was known for liking Jaffa Cakes, and he and Neil had their own catchphrases: “one more time for luck,” and “it’s been emotional,” respectively.

By the end of my second year I felt so close to my tutors and fellow students that I decided to make our group photo the header of this blog (see above). From left to right the people photographed are Emily Bennet (out of shot, see Home Page version); Emma Cooper; Jane Stevenson; Lianna Magnus (crouched); Harpinda Thind; Graham Gladin (crouched); Katherine Kane (pictured); me; Neil Nixon; Thomas Lander (crouched); Scott Barker and Paul Davis.

Overall, my experiences in College were rather mixed: I didn’t have to live on campus – like I thought I would – but I still had to wake up early and travel in on two different buses; I was only in three days a week, but the amount of work I had to do kept me busy almost every day; I understood my assignments most of the time, but I’d always get stressed if I thought I was doing something wrong; my perfectionism allowed me to do well in tasks, but it always took me longer to complete them – especially when I had travelling, driving lessons and other work experience alongside my studies. It was a big problem when my tasks had to be done within a week or a couple of days.

In the beginning, I honestly wasn’t sure if I could handle the pressures of College. Mike noticed me felling this way and asked if I was happy doing the course – I hesitated when I answered, yes. But as time went on, I learnt to deal with things a lot better. And, by staying on the course, I achieved many things I never would have by myself. An article I’d written on Autism was published in an NAS magazine (my first ever publication); I contributed to a book called ‘Successful Studying’ (2013); one of my tasks inspired me to write a children’s book series and I even got advice from Jacqueline Wilson (via email). Plus, our Professional Writing group was the first where none of the students quit the course before finishing and our grades were higher than any of the previous years.

When the second year was done we had an ‘End of Year Show’ where everybody presented something to express how much they’d learnt. Much like this blog, I decided to put together a presentation telling everybody about what I’d been through since Primary School and what my hopes were for the future – it was very well-received.

Little did I know the end of College meant the beginning of a new life at Greenwich University – the most stressful, yet rewarding 24 weeks of my life.

(To Be Continued)

I hope you enjoyed this post. If so then please feel free to check out some of the other material I’ve written for this blog – especially the previous parts on my Primary and Secondary School experiences. If you have any questions then leave me a comment – I’ll be happy to answer them. And, as always, keep an eye out for the next post. Stay tuned.