Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbott (Twelve Forever) – Part 3

Continued from Parts 1 and 2.

Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbot (Twelve Forever) – Part 1 | The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com)

Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbot (Twelve Forever) – Part 2 | The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com)

When I first started writing this article, I intended to analyse Twelve Forever so I could determine whether Reggie, the main character, was Autistic or not. While doing so, however, I came to admire the series for something else: its true intention. The longer I watched the episodes, the more it became clear they were written with a preteen audience in mind. They didn’t teach lessons, exactly, but rather experiences. They were the sort of moments everyone goes through in life, and the stories were guides to handling them. I’ve already explained how Episode 1 teaches us to let go of the past while valuing our memories. But there are other examples throughout the series. Episode 3, for instance, teaches us the challenges of making and accepting new friends. 

You may’ve noticed (in the last parts) I haven’t mentioned Reggie’s other friend, Esther, all that much. That’s because they don’t officially become friends until the third episode. And the process isn’t as straightforward as you might think. 

When Esther is introduced, she’s shown to be a grade-A student. She’s passionate about many things, like reading and learning, and is determined to be the best she can be. Unfortunately, nobody at school shares her mindset. Her classmates – including Reggie and Todd – think she’s too analytical about everything, and her book reports are long and tedious. Even the teacher seems to belittle her for it. As a result, Esther always feels like she’s always messing up and that her efforts will never be appreciated.

I can personally relate to this feeling. Sometimes I spend weeks or months working on a single project because I have limited spare time outside my job. I sacrifice a lot to ensure it’s made to the best of my ability. However, that doesn’t always mean it’ll be successful. Sometimes people aren’t interested in everything I say, so my piece doesn’t get the attention or views I hoped for. It’s tough whenever you put so much effort into something only to get so little in return. It makes you wonder if the time you spent was worth it. Or if you were better off doing something else. Now imagine someone like Esther going through that daily. She’d have confidence issues for sure. That’s why it’s necessary to let off steam somewhere.

One day, Reggie and Todd skip detention to go to Endless. However, they’re shocked to find Esther is there too. As it turns out, she has a homemade flute which lets her visit the island – much like Reggie and Todd’s keys. Because she often feels pressured by her parents’ expectations, she needs a place to refresh her mentality. Todd is fascinated that other people can visit Endless. But Reggie is annoyed. She doesn’t like the idea of “book report girl” stepping in on her special place and acts very territorial. It’s another example of how much Reggie despises even the slightest change in her life. Esther insists she’s not there to cause trouble. But Reggie is determined to ditch her. Until she gets caught in quicksand, that is. Esther uses her Endless powers to save Reggie, and the latter realises she’s not as dull as she thought.

Deciding whether to be someone’s friend can feel like a challenge in and of itself. You never know how long a relationship will last, and things like having different ages, religions or personal interests could be considered obstacles. However, the only important question to ask yourself is if you want to befriend that person. Even two significantly different people can find enough common ground to form a friendship. Or at least be happy spending more time together. As demonstrated by Reggie, she doesn’t mind being called Esther’s friend.

Todd also has his series highlights. In the fourth episode, his brother, Aron, goes to college, leaving him as the oldest sibling in the house. As such, his parents rely on him more than ever to look after his younger sisters. He seems to manage just fine. But then he’s seen creating new friends on Endless from his brother’s old things. Reggie has no clue what’s going on. But Esther picks up that Todd is angry. He’s always been very close to his brother, so he feels betrayed by his leaving. Rather than talk about it, though, Todd wants to make a replacement for Aron to fill the void in his life – even though no one can ever truly replace his brother. Esther and Reggie assure Todd that even if Aron isn’t around anymore, he still has them to confide in with his problems. Plus, his family show how much they appreciate his hard work.

So the three main characters are all very relatable; their experiences are common to almost any twelve-year-old watching. However, even when the storylines aren’t familiar, they still add a sense of realism to the series. 

For example, in one episode (20), Reggie and her friends plan to spend a week on Endless for Spring Break. However, Reggie starts to feel unwell. She thinks it’s a stomach ache. But then she suddenly vomits and passes out. Why? Because it’s revealed her appendix has burst, and she needs to spend time in the hospital. It’s a scary moment that reminds us how human these characters are.

In another episode (14), Reggie finds a box of her dad’s old things. She acts like it doesn’t bother her so much. But then her inner feelings manifest as a storm monster on Endless, which forces her to open up. It leads to an emotional scene where she tearfully consults her mom and learns the harsh reality of why her dad left. 

The series can be nonsensical and funny at times with its fantasy elements. But when the episodes want to be serious, nothing gets sugarcoated. Instead, the characters speak to each other like real people going through emotional conflicts. If there’s one thing Twelve Forever excels at, it’s communicating its morals.

Another praiseworthy aspect is the series’ depiction of LGTBQ+. Several characters are shown to have affectionate feelings for those of the same gender. Episode 7, for example, centres around Mack and Beefhouse (two male wrestlers) expressing their love for being the other’s partner. Another Endless resident (Galaxander) has a house date with a male shark and admits to having an ex-boyfriend (ep13). It’s even implied that Reggie, herself, might be gay. Halfway through the series, an older girl named Conelly is introduced. She’s an aspiring filmmaker and admires Reggie for her creativity. She even invites her to hang out with her and her friends so they can work on projects together. Afterwards, Reggie gets flustered whenever she’s around Conelly – as if she’s trying to suppress feelings she doesn’t fully understand.

I love how the series approaches LGTBQ+ so causally. Too often in media, creators state how they’ve included gay, transgender or bisexual characters in their products to show they’re all-inclusive. However, drawing attention to them this way implies those sorts of people are out of the ordinary. There are films, series and documentaries where they’re meant to be the main focus. But when they’re not, it can feel like their sexuality is being exploited for marketing. I think the best way to represent LGTBQ+ characters is to present them as regular people in society. As same-gender relationships become more commonplace and widely accepted, why should they be portrayed any differently in media?

Reggie’s main appeal isn’t that she’s potentially gay. It’s that she’s a character we can all see ourselves in. She represents a phase in our lives we all inevitably go through. And we have to overcome it because it’s essential to our future.

On that note, let me tell you what this series’ fantasy setting represents. As much as Endless gets presented as this fun-filled sunny paradise where kids can escape their worries and live out their dreams, it doesn’t want to give the wrong idea that it’s a permanent solution to Reggie’s troubles. It’s not trying to say that if you don’t want to grow up, you can stay a carefree, unresponsible child forever. Instead, the island is meant to relieve kids of stress so they can work through their problems and be better prepared for the real world. Even in episodes like the one involving Reggie’s dad, it’s clarified there are some things she can’t run away from on Endless.

Another way this message is delivered is by showing the audience how dangerous the island can be. There are physical threats such as the Butt Witch, the various monsters and a genuine risk of injury. However, the most disturbing aspect is the island’s residents. Throughout the series, they occasionally mention living in the real world before coming to the island. It sounds odd at first. But then we get to episode 20. 

While Reggie recovers in the hospital, she insists that Todd and Esther should spend Spring Break on Endless – just like they planned. But they have to call her daily so she knows what’s happening. Todd and Esther agree. But they slowly begin to forget Reggie, and the real world, the longer they spend on Endless. Moreover, because the time of day never changes on the island, they lose track of how long they’ve been there, and soon five whole days have passed. By the time Reggie returns, she’s shocked to find her friends are on the verge of insanity and are morphing into disfigured creatures. The only thing that saves them is Reggie bringing them back to the real world so they can regain their senses.

Seeing what happens when you’re exposed to too much magic is disturbing. But Todd and Esther were lucky enough to escape. The series’ darkest moment comes when the three friends meet Captain Elmer (episode 23), a mysterious visitor who looks like a young boy. Initially, they’re convinced he’s a travelling collector because he owns a giant sea creature filled with treasure. However, it’s later revealed he’s a master thief, and they catch him red-handed. After apprehending him, though, they discover a photograph which tells the whole story.

Elmer was a boy from the 1950s who came to Endless wanting to escape his misery. His mother had died of illness, and he lived in an orphanage. So much had already been taken from him that he wanted to regain his happiness in any way he could. Endless allowed him to take whatever he wanted without consequences. So he vowed never to return to his dismal real-world life. However, staying on Endless all those years caused him to transform into a doll with detachable limbs. Now he’s stuck in this world forever because he’s lost his humanity.

Endless isn’t meant to be a scary or evil place. But like everything in life, too much of something can be devastating. In this case, the story emphasises why the island’s magic is only beneficial in moderation. Additionally, it shows how pain and misfortune can corrupt a young child’s mind, causing them to develop into unsavoury people. Their problems must be identified early on, so others can give them the help and support they need. Otherwise, they’ll be led down a path they’ll never return from.

Unfortunately, despite the moral of this cautionary tale being plain for everyone to see, the episode ends on a worrying note. Because although Todd, Esther and the audience realise how horrifying Elmer’s fate is, the one person who doesn’t grasp it is the person who needs to learn from it the most: Reggie. Not only does the tragedy go over her head, but she thinks Elmer staying a kid forever is cool and wants to be like him. Worse still, now that she knows Endless is broader than she imagined, it’s given her a terrible plan for the future. When she’s old enough to leave home, she’ll live on Endless permanently and spend the rest of her life exploring its other islands. We know this is an awful idea because we’ve seen the consequences. But Reggie doesn’t care. She thinks she’ll be luckier than everyone else and handle things better. Sadly, this is the biggest flaw with Reggie’s character; when she sets her mind to something, she can be extremely stubborn and selfish.

Looking at the relationship between the three friends, they generally get along very well. However, Reggie often takes the lead in saying what they’ll do and when. She hardly listens to reason and doesn’t like being told no. Also, going back to what I said about her being possessive, she seems to think all of Endless is meant to revolve around her. There’s an episode (13) where the group sees into the homes of the island’s residents, and Reggie is shocked that they have lives outside of playing with her. The point where everything hits a fever pitch, though, is when Todd starts falling in love.

It begins with the three friends attending a school dance (ep21). Todd spends some time with a girl named Gwen – who he’s been seeing outside of school lately – and even Esther finds somebody to dance with. Reggie is left all alone to observe how mature both her friends look. Conelly then arrives with her friends. But Reggie panics and wants to leave. Todd refuses to go. So Reggie forcibly drags Esther away from her partner – ruining a special moment between them. Ultimately, Esther feels heartbroken and decides to go home – leaving Reggie by herself again.

Reggie’s inability to read a situation, or consider other people’s feelings, is harmful to both her and her friends. Nowhere is this better shown than in the series’ penultimate episode (24).

For Todd’s thirteenth birthday, Reggie plans a celebration for him on Endless. He’s excited to go, but then he mentions he’s planning to bring Gwen along – who’s now officially his girlfriend. Reggie is outraged at the idea and refuses to allow it – even though she’s brought others to Endless before too. They get into a heated argument until Todd refuses to attend the party. Reggie then goes on a rampage, destroying everything she prepared out of rage. Esther tries calming her down by reminding her of when they first became friends – maybe they can warm up to Gwen too. But Reggie is having none of it. She enjoys her life with just the three of them and doesn’t want Todd to give in to real-world temptations. It’s a moment that exposes Reggie’s insecurities and how stuck she is in the present. Unfortunately, things quickly go from bad to worse.

Todd comes to Endless, intending to apologise. But he hits a breaking point when he sees what Reggie has done to the party. He’s tired of her acting so selfish and immature whenever something doesn’t go her way. Even if she set up the party for him, she still destroyed it because she didn’t want there to be an extra guest. He’s also mad at Esther for never standing up to Reggie, and Esther doesn’t appreciate him putting words in her mouth. Things get so out of hand that the friends start attacking one another until Reggie screams at them to “get off [her] island!” Todd and Esther leave in a bitter rage, and Reggie is left broken and miserable. It’s the most harrowing scene of the whole series.

Now, eventually, the friends do reconcile (ep25). And they even work together to save Endless from its deadliest threat yet. However, it’s clear Reggie still has a lot to learn. After all, we never hear her apologise to Todd or Esther; we only assume that happened off-screen. 

But although Reggie lacks the qualities of a good role model, that doesn’t mean she’s a terrible person. There are moments throughout the series where she’s been willing to try new things. She watches TV shows and plays board games for older audiences (eps16/19). She offers to babysit, despite having no experience (ep15). And she even takes responsibility for residents on Endless, like building new homes for newcomers (ep14). The opportunities for Reggie to grow as a person are there. It’s just that she needs the confidence to take those next steps. Like starting a babysitting business (as her mom suggested), becoming friends with Conelly, or taking the latter’s advice and using her creativity to become an art director. Sometimes it takes encouragement from the right people to provide that much-needed confidence. 

***

Now, at this point, I have to address the reader on something. You might’ve spent this whole time reading and had one question on your mind. Wasn’t this article supposed to be about whether Reggie was Autistic or not? Well, that is true. I have been procrastinating on the subject. However, there’s a good reason for it. I had very different intentions when I wrote Part 1 of this article. I thought it would be like the other instalments of Are They Autistic? where I would look over a piece of media, pick out specific details and use those to determine whether the character was on the spectrum. However, that’s not what I ended up doing. As I sat down to watch this series, I realised it was much more than I ever expected. There were so many enlightening moments with the stories, morals and characters that I had to give them the attention they deserved – even if that meant writing for a few more weeks and making the title slightly misleading.

With that said, though, I still need to answer the all-important question. Is Reggie Abbott, the main protagonist, Autistic? Well, you might be disappointed to hear this, but to tell the truth, I don’t know. 

As I mentioned before, in Part 1, Reggie and I have many similarities. The most significant is that she’s reluctant to change and has a creative mind. I even found other comparisons throughout the series, like her habit of collecting strange things (ep11) – which I had when I was younger – and loving anime music (ep21). However, despite these findings, they weren’t enough to convince me that no other explanation was possible. There was no defining moment where I thought, for sure, that Reggie had to be Autistic. For Haruhi Suzumiya, it was when she wore her hair a specific way each day of the week (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya). For Beth Rivers, it was eating everything on her plate in one particular order (Rose Rivers). But for Reggie Abbott, her interests and issues were common to many children with or without neurological disabilities. Plus, any supporting evidence I did find was few and far between. And they didn’t connect in the way I was hoping.

All things considered, though, I don’t want to claim that Reggie isn’t Autistic. If somebody watched Twelve Forever and told me they thought she was on the spectrum, I wouldn’t argue against it. There certainly is evidence supporting that claim. But there wasn’t enough for me to give a definite answer.

Besides, looking at the series overall, it’s clear that presenting Reggie as Autistic was never the intention. Instead, she and the other characters are meant to be as all-inclusive as possible so different audiences can connect with the series. It’s their personalities and experiences that make them so relatable.

Twelve Forever had a lot of potential going for it. More than likely, it could’ve been a long-running series with multiple seasons. Unfortunately, though, that’s now unlikely to happen. I won’t go into details here, but things were discovered about the series’ creator that would make anyone hesitant to work with her again – especially on something aimed at children. 

However, it takes more than one person to bring a project to life. And judging by how it turned out, Twelve Forever had many passionate people working on it: animators, writers, storyboarders, and even voice actors. In particular, there was Reggie’s voice actor: Kelsy Abbott. It’s no coincidence they share the same surname. If you look closely at some of the episodes’ credits, you’ll see Kelsy lent a hand in writing them. That’s right; a voice actor had the chance to write stories for her own character. It’s a rarity that you see that kind of commitment. But finding a series that far surpasses its expectations is rarer.

I would highly recommend this series to anyone in Reggie’s age group. If you’ve ever felt on edge about growing up, changing who you are or taking the next steps in life, Twelve Forever can be very informative. But even if you’re nowhere near her age, the series still offers morals and experiences that all ages can learn from. Believe me when I say I haven’t touched on half of them.

Anyway, that’s all I have to say for Twelve Forever and Reggie Abbott. If you’ve taken the time to read all three parts of this extensive review, then I want to thank you personally for your patience. If you have any questions, please comment below – I’ll happily answer them. And, until next time, stay tuned.

Image courtesy of: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8009622/?ref_=tt_mv_close

Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbot (Twelve Forever) – Part 2

Continued from Part 1 (Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbot (Twelve Forever) – Part 1 | The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com))

Before I begin, I need to give you all some context. I started writing Part 1 of this article before watching any episodes of Twelve Forever. The rest of it was written after I’d finished the series. I did things this way because I wanted to make a point about first impressions. 

When you’re introduced to something for the first time, there’s little information to go on. All you have is what you see on the surface, like a TV trailer or someone’s appearance. It’s easy to draw conclusions from this simple information – perhaps because you’ve been taught the most likely outcomes. However, the crucial thing to remember about first impressions is they often turn out wrong. Maybe not entirely false. But there’s always more to something than what you initially perceived. It’s like judging a book by its cover. The title, blub and artwork can give you an idea of what to expect inside. But until you experience what’s written yourself, you’ll never understand what makes the book unique.

The same can be applied to people. Too often, those with Autism have their behaviours misidentified. Struggling to process information, for example, could be viewed as laziness or having hearing problems. It results in those people not getting the proper help they need. And all because the observing party didn’t understand the individual. It can work in reverse as well. Sometimes it’s easy to tell if someone is Autistic. Like when they’re obsessed with doing something a specific way, even if it appears strange to everyone else. But in most cases, it takes time and careful observation to determine whether someone is on the spectrum. That was the mindset I had going into Twelve Forever.

I wasn’t sure how long it would take me to work out if Reggie was Autistic or not. As explained in Part 1, I had many things in common with her character. But these similarities weren’t enough to be definitive proof. I needed to see something that would leave no doubt it was anything other than Autism.

So what did I learn from watching this series’ 25 episodes? Well, more than I was expecting. But also not what I expected at all. Let’s take a look.

***

Firstly, I’d like to acknowledge the series’ art direction. It uses a simplified style that appeals to both kids and young adults. When looking at the human characters, for example, some of their features do have realistic proportions. However, others use basic shapes, like circles and squares, to give them a slightly exaggerated appearance. As for the residents of Endless, their designs are certainly creative. But they’re not overly complex. You could believe they were imagined by a 12-year-old or younger (as the series implies they are). 

Furthermore, the series has two distinct colour pallets. In the real world (for whatever reason), it’s always snowy where the main characters live – even during Spring time. So there are always dull, boring colours everywhere, like whites, browns and greys. In contrast, Endless is a sunny paradise, forever bursting with warm, brighter colours. 

I think balancing these different aesthetics was essential for the series. Not only does it reflect how Reggie views both worlds, but it visually attracts the right sort of audience. Remember that the series’ primary goal is to show the characters’ growing maturity. So it makes sense to have an art style that draws in younger viewers but still emphasises the show’s coming-of-age themes. Speaking of which, let’s observe how Twelve Forever presents some of these themes through its stories. A good example is the first episode.

Episode 1 begins with Reggie celebrating her Twelfth birthday. It’s a simple party with only three guests: her mother, Judy; her brother, Dustin; and her best friend, Todd. The first time we see Reggie, she’s sitting at the table playing with an action figure. She and Todd are having a blast. But Judy and Dustin’s expressions show how they feel about this juvenile behaviour. Then Reggie gets given her birthday presents. However, aside from a music CD and a used gift card, they mostly turn out to be clothes or hygiene products. Reggie tries to act grateful. But she ultimately feels depressed at not getting anything she asked for. Her mother then reminds her they talked about her birthday being different this year; she won’t need so many toys now that she’s older. Besides, what she’s been given can be fun too. It’s just fun in a different way.

An opening scene can tell a lot about a series and its direction. In this case, it does a fine job of setting the tone and establishing the characters’ personalities. As mentioned above, the cold weather and muted colours contrast the happy celebration. Also, the party takes place in a small kitchen without decorations, and even the presents don’t have the fanciest wrapping paper. It makes our introduction to Endless feel more appealing later. 

As for the characters, the series wastes no time showcasing Reggie’s immaturity. Besides playing with toys, her first line of dialogue is, “Come on, mom, I’m not that grown-up.” So she’s instantly dismissive of her age. Plus, we see how tormented she is by her gifts. Making room in her life for these mature things doesn’t excite her one bit. And her mother’s words do nothing to change that. It seems her birthday has become less of a celebration and more of a reminder that she’s losing the best years of her life.

The scene isn’t entirely depressing, though. Todd is a welcomed presence because he provides comic relief whenever necessary. More importantly, though, he’s shown to be close friends with Reggie. He indulges in her childish ways, and she appreciates his company. However, given Todd is her only friend at the party, it’s an early indication of how few she has.

As for Dustin and Judy, they each represent what I despise and love about the sub-characters in this series respectively. 

Dustin, you see, is portrayed as a stereotypical teenager; someone who’s laidback, bitter, and puts little care or effort into anything – he’s the one who gave Reggie the used gift card. Not to mention he’s later revealed to be a conspiracy theorist and has a blog dedicated to spreading crazy stories (ep6). Unfortunately, several other human characters in the series have these generic personalities. Sometimes you get teen bands trying too hard to act cool (ep22) or teachers who’re overly timid or unprofessional (ep9). They’re just feeble attempts at comedy that weaken the series’ credibility. Fortunately, though, they aren’t featured too often. And they do nothing to harm the series’ more serious aspects. There’s even an episode where Reggie reconnects with her estranged brother over something they made when they were younger (ep6).

On the other hand, Judy is one of the series’ most down-to-earth characters; she embodies every parent who worries about their child’s natural growth. Truthfully, it shouldn’t be an issue that Reggie has particular interests. Or they’re so different from her mother’s when she was younger. But it’s sad for Judy knowing they have nothing in common – especially when she seems to relate more to other girls Reggie’s age (ep8). Also, since her daughter is reluctant to try new things, Judy worries that Reggie won’t move forward with her life and will struggle with adulthood. 

Parental figures are a delicate aspect of children’s media. If a series is more comedy-based, it’s natural to portray them as goofy or eccentric. Their roles aren’t meant to be taken seriously there. However, for a series like Twelve Forever, the writers knew it was important for Judy to be as believable as possible. Sometimes the episodes needed someone to ground them in reality to convey their messages. And it works exceedingly well here. Any time Judy is onscreen, we feel the stress she’s under to be a good mother. She has to put her foot down when Reggie acts too immaturely sometimes (ep8). But she also doesn’t want to upset or peer pressure her. Growing up is a stressful process. So whenever she has to talk to Reggie about it, she uses a soft-spoken tone and looks for ways of making the transition smoother. The first episode demonstrates this approach quite well.

While preparing for a garage sale, Judy finds a box of Reggie’s old things. Since her daughter hasn’t touched it in years, she decides to sell it. However, Reggie is adamant about the idea. The box is filled with remnants of her childhood, and she can’t bear the thought of parting with them. It’s frustrating for Judy at first. But she comes up with a compromise. She gives Reggie until the end of the day to go through her stuff and decide what she can’t live without – anything else has to go. It seems like a good plan. But Reggie is too emotionally attached and feels she can’t get rid of any of it. 

Personally speaking, I can understand Reggie’s feelings. Usually, in hoarding situations, you have to ask yourself logical questions. For example, what’s the difference in not owning something if you never use it anymore? Maybe you could argue you’ll use it eventually. But are you more likely to use something else when the time comes? Is the item as valuable to you as other things you own? Does it make any significant difference in your life? When you ask yourself these questions, the choice of whether to keep something becomes easier to decide. 

However, just because something isn’t useful doesn’t mean it has no sentimental value. For example, I own a teddy bear that I’ve had since the day I was born. I don’t sleep with it anymore, of course. But I still hold onto it because it was given to me by my late grandmother. Throwing it away would be like throwing away a part of her and the connection we had. 

Reggie feels the same about her old toys and sketches. Precious memories are attached to them, and she doesn’t want to risk forgetting. So instead of throwing them out, she decides she’ll keep them in her special place. Somewhere no adult can reach them.

Surprisingly, it’s revealed that Reggie and Todd already have the power to go to Endless. And they’ve been visiting the island for some time now. It’s not until later in the series that we learn how everything started. 

About a year ago (episode 17), Reggie didn’t fit in well at school; her fantasies made her seem weird to other kids, and even her family looked down on her. One day, during art class, she made a key out of modelling clay, telling her teacher she wanted it to take her away from her boring town forever. Following another conflict at home, Reggie wished with all her might to go someplace where she could just be herself. Her desire granted the key its magic and whisked her away to Endless. Initially, she was freaked out by what happened (episode 18); especially when meeting the strange, abstract creatures who inhabited the island. However, she soon realised Endless was everything she’d ever hoped for. The residents admire her fun-loving attitude. She can do whatever she wants without consequence. And there are so many activities to discover that the only limit is her imagination. It’s a perfect child’s paradise. 

Shortly afterwards, Reggie met Todd – the only person at school who seemed interested in her abnormalities. While spending time with him, she learned he was also stressed about getting older; he’s always having to look after his boisterous younger siblings, among other new responsibilities. Sensing Todd’s need for escapism, Reggie showed him the way to Endless. And they’ve been sharing adventures there ever since.

From a writer’s perspective, this backstory does everything it’s meant to. It establishes the main characters’ personalities and motivations. It also sets up their ordinary world before introducing the new one with its different rules. However, my only objection is that it comes too late in the series. It would’ve been better to have it as the opening episode so we could’ve followed the characters’ development from the beginning. Also, given Reggie and Todd are very familiar with Endless (in episode 1), and the audience isn’t, there’s a bit of disconnection. Sometimes they need to learn things along with the characters to form an emotional bond.

That being said, when the series does teach moral lessons, they’re some of the most personal I’ve ever experienced. They’re not simple run-of-the-mill lessons or even widely-appealing ones; they’re specifically chosen to guide viewers in Reggie and Todd’s age group. Preteen problems take centre stage in Twelve Forever.

For instance, going back to episode 1, Reggie takes the box of her old things to Endless and buries it in the sand. Surprisingly, it brings all of her toys and sketches to life. It also turns a label-maker into a monster which Reggie and Todd defeat with their superpowers. After things quiet down, though, we learn something intriguing. According to Reggie, once something is brought to Endless, it can never return to the real world. So even though she has some new friends on Endlesss, things will never be the same back home. It’s symbolic because the island represents Reggie’s childhood. By leaving her old things here, she’s essentially letting go of a piece of her past. However, that doesn’t mean she has to forget the positive memories they’ve left her. Plus, she can revisit them anytime she needs a break from her stressful life.

The series is very clever in how it teaches things metaphorically like this. In Part 3, I’ll give you some more examples. As well as answer the all-important question: is Reggie Autistic? Stay tuned.

Image courtesy of: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8009622/?ref_=tt_mv_close

Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbot (Twelve Forever) – Part 1

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger). Welcome to another instalment of Are They Autistic?: the series where I look at characters from various forms of media and analyse whether I think they’re on the spectrum or not.

Today we’ll be looking at Regina “Reggie” Abbot, the main character of the Netflix animated series Twelve Forever. It’s a series I’ve been interested in seeing for a while now but never got around to it. Either because I couldn’t find the time to or because I didn’t have a Netflix account. However, the series has stayed on my mind because parts of the trailer intrigued me about Reggie’s character. Let me explain.

From what I could tell, Reggie is a preteen girl struggling with the reality that she’s growing up. She’s embarrassed to get a bra for her birthday, feels awkward going clothes shopping, and shows no interest in things like makeup or beauty magazines – much to her mother’s disappointment. Furthermore, Reggie seems determined to stay a child no matter what. She spends her time drawing pictures and making costumes; she paints her face black and white, claiming to be a “dead skunk bride“, and has a collection of stuffed animals and action figures. In her own words, she describes herself as “some weird loser who’s loud and awkward and still plays with toys.” 

As you can imagine, Reggie’s desire to stay young causes problems in her social life; she has few friends who share her interests, and it even puts her at odds with her family. Moreover, the situation causes her stress. She knows growing up is inevitable. But she’s worried it’ll mean giving up everything she loves and condemning herself to a life of boredom and misery. Nobody wants that. But it feels like there’s nothing she can do about it. The world is bearing down on her.

One day, Reggie gets so frustrated that she can’t bear reality anymore. She wants to go someplace where she can just be herself. “Where everyone’s cool, and no one ever tells [her] to grow up.” Amazingly, she gets her wish. Through the power of her desires – and a magical key – Reggie and her friends (Todd and Esther) can visit the world of Endless: an island full of bizarre creatures and neverending fun. They’re also granted superpowers, which come in handy when protecting the island from threats such as the Butt Witch. It’s the perfect place for Reggie to escape her worries and live out her fantasies. But it also allows her time to work through her growing pains and resolve conflicts with her friends. Maybe then she’ll learn getting older isn’t as dull and depressing as it seems.

So you might be wondering why I’ve chosen this series and character, specifically. After all, dealing with maturity is a relatable story we’ve heard many times before. Even the addition of a fantasy world easing us through the transition is nothing new – think of classic novels like Peter Pan or Alice in Wonderland. However, I couldn’t help drawing comparisons between Reggie and myself. It’s a little farfetched to say so, but I think her behaviour is similar to someone with Autism. Let me give you some examples.

Firstly, there’s Reggie’s reluctance to change. As mentioned before, getting older is never easy; it comes with many new challenges and experiences. For people with Autism, though, these changes are especially harsh. Understanding the world around us can be difficult, given how differently our minds process information. Because of that, we tend to fixate on whatever we find familiar or amusing. We take comfort in these things because they’re simple to understand, and we know the rules. However, when stepping out of these comfort zones, we know our disabilities will sometimes make new experiences longer and harder to learn. Plus, there’s no guarantee we’ll succeed in them as well as most people. Usually, that’s not the case, and we manage just fine or even better. But it doesn’t make the learning period any less stressful or scary. Consequently, we’re more hesitant to commit to it and often default to what we know.

In Reggie’s case, it’s similar. The thought of becoming a young adult is off-putting to her because it’s entirely different from the life she’s always known. I couldn’t tell from the trailer if she has trouble understanding the world. But her childish antics are more extreme for someone her age – even by some Autistic standards. I’ve already given a few examples above. However, we’re also shown a comparison with Reggie’s brother, Dustin; he’s adjusted to being a teenager much better than his sister – who he now sees as an annoying pest. With so much changing in her life, Reggie takes comfort in the remnants of her childhood. They’re reminders of times when everything was fun and familiar. Maybe she acts the way she does because she doesn’t want to grow up. Or perhaps something inside her is affecting her confidence, which makes moving on too emotionally demanding.

There’s also the fact that Reggie has specific interests. Having a different perspective of the world means Autistic people are sometimes fascinated by the most unusual things. For example, Maud Pie and Mud Briar (Friendship is Magic) are interested in rocks and sticks, respectively. Haruhi Suzumiya (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya) is drawn to anything not remotely normal. I’m someone who watches a show about colourful talking ponies that’s aimed primarily at young girls. And Reggie loves toys and being creative. For an outsider looking in, these things are strange or irrelevant to obsess over. Thus it often creates distance between them and the Autistic person. We see this with Reggie’s mother trying to get her daughter interested in fashion. However, anything can be fascinating if you take the time to understand what makes them so uniquely appealing. The problem is finding people who share that passion for something so specific. Or a least know why you love it so much. Most people usually gravitate to what’s popular with everyone, and that’s that.

Out of everything I took from Twelve Forever‘s trailer, though, the most intriguing part was when Reggie’s mother explains that her daughter “locks herself in her room for hours, making up stories and living in her own little world.” Hearing these words, I couldn’t help thinking back to my preteen days. I’ve expressed it before, but when I was younger, I always thought about my favourite TV shows, games and characters. I’d relive them inside my head, even at the most inopportune times. I then started coming up with my own stories and ideas, which led me to want to pursue a career in creative writing. Could it be that Reggie is also at this stage? Could she unknowingly be setting herself up to make a living off her passions? It’s entirely possible. After all, parts of Endless are created from her imagination, drawings and toys. Not to mention “living in their own world” is a common way of describing Autistic behaviour. This similarity with me was the most convincing evidence I had thus far.

So you might think I have a solid case for proving that Reggie is Autistic. However, keep in mind everything I’ve mentioned so far comes from my impressions of the trailer – and a few short clips on YouTube. You also have to remember that Autism is several different conditions working together. And they can affect people in different ways. For example, I have a girlfriend who’s also on the spectrum. But unlike me, she doesn’t have Asperger’s Syndrome. So whereas I find it difficult to talk in most social situations, she can talk for hours about almost anything non-stop. 

Just because there are similarities between Reggie and me doesn’t mean we’re both Autistic. The only way I’d know for sure is if I watched the series for myself. Did it confirm or disprove any of my theories? Find out in Part 2 (Are They Autistic? – Reggie Abbot (Twelve Forever) – Part 2 | The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com)).

Image courtesy of: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8009622/?ref_=tt_mv_close

Love and Autism

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger). Today I’m taking a break from writing analytical pieces to share something personal with you. Three years ago today, something remarkable happened to me. It was a moment I thought may never happen because of my Autism. But it did. And I can honestly say I’m a more sociable person because of it. It’s even helped me to get out of the house and do things I never would’ve considered. What do I mean? It was three years ago today that I began devoting myself to another person. July 23rd is the anniversary of when I first met my girlfriend.

Before I go into details, let me rewind the clock a few years. 

I’ve sometimes wondered when it is somebody first starts thinking about love. Of course, when you’re younger, you have the love from your family, your school friends, and other adults who care for your wellbeing. But I mean romantic love. The feelings you get when you want to be with someone forever. Or show them they’re more than just a friend to you. Primary School, in most cases, seems too early. You’re still experiencing the basics of life, and romance can feel as far off as driving a car or getting a job. There are exceptions, of course. True love can blossom almost anywhere. But the most you get from younger children is pretending to be in love or having imaginary weddings. It’s not something they usually take so seriously. 

Early Secondary School – or late Primary – is when things start changing. At this stage, you’re more aware of what life offers you outside of school. Admittedly, some parts can be stressful; schoolwork is challenging, daily routines are busier, and you have to take on many new responsibilities. However, there’s also a sense of pride that comes with it. Reaching this stage in your life proves you’ve worked hard to get there. You realise you’re closer to adulthood and want to experience its benefits. These include choosing a career, being more independent, and, of course, falling in love.

When it comes to romantic feelings, your first time can be something simple. Maybe there’s someone in your school you like because they’re attractive. Or there’s a celebrity you admire because of their wealth and success. In these cases, though, you’re missing the essential component of a relationship: compatibility. Two people need to have something in common for a relationship to work. It could be a hobby, an interest or something more personal. But there has to be common ground: something that makes you want to keep meeting and talking with that person. If you just like somebody for their appearance, then – as the old saying goes – “take a picture, it will last longer.” There’s also nothing wrong with admiring celebrities. Just so long as you remember, there’s a difference between loving someone and idolising them. Realistically, someone like a celebrity is beyond your reach. Even if you spent years building yourself up to their status, they’d likely already be taken by that point. Plus, setting your standards too high will cause you to miss opportunities in your younger years. There could be someone perfect for you right under your nose, and you’d never notice because you’re busy obsessing over a hopeless fantasy. It’s harsh, but it’s true.

Another harsh reality is that everyone looking to find love will inevitably experience heartbreak. Finding the right match can be tricky. And, along the way, you will end up loving the wrong person – someone who won’t always love you back or for the right reasons. Regardless, it’s essential to keep searching and persevere. A day will come when your efforts will pay off. Trust me, I know.

My first experience of “young love” was back in Primary School. My mum was close friends with someone whose daughter was in the same year group as my sister and me. We’d spend time together outside of school, and she became one of our closest friends. I don’t know when it started exactly, but I liked this girl enough that I began fantasising we were boyfriend and girlfriend. It never turned into anything genuine, though. It was similar to when I imagined meeting my favourite TV characters in the playground at breaktimes. It was just words and make-believe. I knew nothing about romance at that age. And even if I did, I wouldn’t have known how I’d make our relationship into a serious one. After Primary School, we started seeing each other less and less. At which point, I knew it was time to move on.

In Secondary School, I took things more seriously. Not just in terms of romance, though. Starting a new school felt very intimidating to me because everything was unfamiliar. I also knew schoolwork and punishments could be harsher if you stepped out of line. I had it in my head that if I kept misbehaving as I did in Primary School, I would never survive this stage in my life. So while everyone else became louder and more rebellious, I was determined to become the best model pupil I could be. 

Anyway, throughout Secondary School, there was a girl in my year I couldn’t help admiring. She wasn’t as boisterous as my other classmates and generally seemed like a nice person. However, I didn’t know anything about her besides that. Also, rather shamefully, I admit that I liked her because she looked like my pretend girlfriend from Primary School. Part of me wanted to know her better. But I was always too nervous to talk to her. Usually, it was better just admiring her from afar. It wasn’t until a week before graduating that I finally found the courage to confess my secret crush on her. She was okay with it. And I was glad I told her. But by that point, of course, it was too little too late.

So now let’s talk about when my life changed for the better; that moment when I met the perfect girl three years ago.

Since leaving Secondary School, I’d never made much effort to find a girlfriend. But I had gotten better at talking to people. I’d made some close friends in college, where I graduated with professional and creative writing degrees. I’d gotten my driver’s licence. I had a well-paid job and a stable living. I was interacting with more people as part of a drama society, and I even managed to rent my first property and move out of my mum’s house. However, despite all of that, I knew something was missing. Because aside from meeting with family members or talking to colleagues at work or drama, I rarely got out and did anything. There was no one to share my life experiences with or encourage me to try new things. I knew if this didn’t change, I would spend the rest of my life alone. Even my mum realised this and told me I had to start looking for a girlfriend. Unfortunately, with no experience in dating and all those years of missed opportunities, I had no idea where to begin. I did create a profile on PlentyOfFish.com. And I also downloaded an app which showed suggestions of people’s names, ages and appearances. But before I got into those too deeply, fate unexpectedly smiled on me.

One afternoon, I was visiting my dad and stepmom. They both knew I was looking for a girlfriend. But I never expected how helpful they’d be. My stepmom told me she knew somebody who knew someone whose relative was a lot like me: being Autistic as well. She also said that if I was interested, she could put me in contact with this girl by giving me her phone number. Part of me was hesitant about diving into this head-first. But I decided to take the chance anyway. After a few days of putting it off (due to nerves), I sent this girl a text message introducing myself. A day or so later, she replied to me, saying she’d be happy to get to know me too. For several weeks, we exchanged texts back and forth, learning more about each other and what we were doing. I was a little thrown off when I found out she was nine years older than me. But as the old saying goes, “age is just a number.” And by the time we met properly, the difference was hardly noticeable. 

Speaking of which, I still remember the first day we met. It was around the time when Disney’s The Lion King (2019) was playing at cinemas. Since we both enjoyed Disney, we arranged to meet and go and see it together. That afternoon, I waited outside Cineworld between some giant movie posters. I sent her a text saying where I was and what I’d be wearing. After several minutes, I saw someone crossing the road towards me. And I knew it had to be her. I wasn’t sure how to think or feel at that moment. Here I was, somebody who’d never been on a date in his life, meeting a girl he’d never seen or spoken to (except through text messages), and now we’d be spending the next few hours together. As it turned out, though, I needn’t have worried. Because when we spoke for the first time, it was clear that she was just as nervous about meeting me. Being on equal footing like this was reassuring to both of us. 

After a friendly exchange, we went inside and talked some more before the movie started. I was astonished by how much we had in common. It wasn’t just our Autism; many of our tastes and interests were similar. We talked about old TV shows we’d seen, what some of our experiences in education were like, and the kinds of jobs we’d had. She also told me how one of her favourite dinners was a burger and chips, with nothing in the burger except the meat and some ketchup. I couldn’t believe it – that was exactly how I enjoyed that meal too. When the movie was over, we had a couple of drinks at a local bar – where I learned she didn’t care for alcohol either – we said our goodbyes and agreed to stay in touch.

Overall, I felt the evening had gone very well. This girl was certainly easy to talk to, and she didn’t seem to have any negative traits. I didn’t know if our relationship would be permanent yet. But I was more than happy to meet with her again. And so we did, several times. Whether walking through the park, going to a bowling alley, eating dinner or just shopping together, we tried to do something different every time we met. Slowly but surely, our relationship developed. I met with her family; she met with mine, and our feelings for one another grew. There was even a moment when I decided to kiss her – instead of hugging as we always did. It was only meant to be on the cheek. But then she leaned forward, and we shared a passionate kiss on the lips. It was then I knew for sure we’d become boyfriend and girlfriend. 

Another memorable day was when my mum met her. After getting to know her, she took me aside and told me how much she liked her. She even said she thought she was the perfect girl for me. And, in all honesty, I had to agree. My girlfriend and I understood each other’s needs and desires. We had that common ground that made us want to keep meeting and doing new things together. Above all else, though, I loved how understanding she could be. Admittedly, I haven’t always been the best boyfriend to her. Sometimes I’ve had to call off our meetings due to work commitments. Sometimes I don’t compliment her enough on her appearance. Even when we’re talking, I sometimes miss parts of what she says because my mind wanders off. I feel ashamed when this happens. So one time, I spoke to her in the car. I told her that if there was anything about me she thought I needed to work on, she should let me know straight away. I wanted our relationship to work out. However, she told me I didn’t need to improve anything. She accepted me for who I was, including my flaws. Plus, she admired my honesty. She’d never had anything like that with her previous boyfriends. It was then that she told me, in her own words, that I was “the best thing that’s ever happened to [her].” Coming from someone who was nine years older and had more experience with romance, that meant a lot to me.

They say that true love is when you have someone in your life you can’t bear to live without. I didn’t know if I felt that way about my girlfriend. But a rather scary situation convinced me otherwise. One evening in 2020, I was home alone when I received the most dreadful news: my girlfriend (and her mum) had caught Covid-19. A wave of concern rushed over me. I knew how deadly the virus could be if you had medical issues. And my girlfriend once told me she’d had problems with asthma, which would put her at greater risk. After everything we’d been through together, all the memories we’d made, and the experiences we’d shared, I didn’t know what I would do if the worst happened. How could I ever find somebody else as perfect as her? Every day I video-called her to see how she was doing. She stayed in high spirits, despite her coughing fits. And I did my best to reassure her. Finally, after two weeks, her (and her mum’s) condition improved, and it was clear she was going to be alright. Since then, I’ve never doubted how much I genuinely love her.

So there you have it: a brief history of this Autistic Blogger’s love life. I hope you’ve enjoyed reading and that I’ve given you some reassurance for the future. The road to finding true love is never easy. It’s full of trial and error. But never let the hardships deter you. It doesn’t matter how old you are, what condition you may have, or if you’ve never had experience with love or dating. There’s somebody out there for everyone. You don’t even need to do what everyone else does, like go on dating sites. Sometimes it’s just a case of taking a chance with the right person at the right time. You never know if that moment will change your life forever.

That’s all I have to say for now. If you have any questions, please leave them in the comments below – I’ll be more than happy to answer them. And, to that special girl I met three years ago today, I just wanted to say, I love you to the moon and back. Happy Anniversary!

See also:

GeoStar The Autistic Vlogger – YouTube

Autistic Blogger Creates – Creative Works by The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com)

Are They Autistic? – Renee (Pixar’s Loop)

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger). Welcome to another instalment of Are They Autistic?: the series where I look at characters from various forms of media and analyse whether I think they’re on the spectrum or not.

Today I decided to try something a little bit different. Instead of a character from a book or TV series, I’ll be analysing one from a short film. Specifically: Renee from Disney Pixar’s Loop (2020). Also, my reasons for choosing her are somewhat different too. Usually, when selecting characters for this series, I prefer those who haven’t been confirmed to be Autistic. The reason is it gives me more leeway to observe their behaviours and make assessments of my own. In Renee’s case, she is confirmed to have Autism. But it’s not the kind I usually analyse. Let me explain.

What’s important to remember about Autism is that it’s not one condition but several neurological ones acting together. Also, these combinations affect different people to varying degrees. Hence why there’s a spectrum. True, there are minor cases where a person only has repetitive behaviours or learning difficulties. Or milder cases (like mine) where it’s hard to process information and socialise. But then there are higher forms. In these cases, people struggle to develop basic motor skills where even speech is difficult. I may not have this form myself. But I have witnessed firsthand how severe it can be when visiting special needs schools. It gave me a newfound appreciation for the personal carers who’re committed to helping such people.

Going back to Renee, she’s advertised as a non-verbal Autistic character. I was keen to see how well-handled her condition would be in this short. After all, it’s one thing to claim a character is highly Autistic; it’s another to portray them as such – there have been misinterpretations before. That being said, I was confident in the studio behind this story. Why? Because it’s Pixar. Yes, the company responsible for innovating mainstream computer animation has also produced multiple short films over the years. Whether it’s their classics like Luxo Jr. (1986), award-winners like Bao (2018), or visual masterpieces like Piper (2016), they always make sure to research the subject thoroughly before putting pen to paper. With this in mind, I knew they wouldn’t take a topic like Autism lightly. So let’s take a look.

As the short begins, we’re immediately introduced to Renee. She’s sitting in a canoe at a campground, listening to a ringtone on her phone. Other kids have already gone paddling ahead, but Renee is too fixated on playing the sound over and over again.

Within the first 30 seconds, the animation establishes a common Autistic trait. When you’re on the spectrum, it’s easy to focus on just one thing rather than everything around you – it’s less stressful that way. As an audience, we can see the other kids paddling away in the distance. But when looking through Renee’s eyes, they’re almost out of focus. All that’s clear to her is the phone and the sound it makes. There are other indications of her condition, as well. She doesn’t look at people when they approach her; she retracts if they get too close and makes loud groans to show her displeasure. Even her facial expressions are realistic, with her glassy eyes and limp smile. Director Erica Milsom knew she had to get Renee’s character across to the audience quickly. And with everything that’s presented visually, it’s clear Renee is Autistic without anyone needing to say it.

However, the short isn’t really about discovering Renee’s condition. Instead, it wants to teach viewers about its effects and how best to interact with someone who has it. To do this, they pair Renee with someone who’s her opposite.

Back on the riverbank, a boy named Marcus arrives. He’s running late and eager to catch up. But the camp counsellor asks him to go with Renee today. He’s somewhat reluctant at first because of her reputation, but the counsellor assures him she likes canoeing too. He also gives Renee some reassurance before pushing them off.

Two things are highlighted in this scene for me. First off, Marcus probably doesn’t know about Renee’s Autism. The way he describes her as “that girl who doesn’t talk” is evidence of this. As such, the audience identifies with him as someone who’s learning about the condition for the first time – maybe like they are. The other point is with the camp councillor. He’s actively trying to encourage better interactions among his campers. It’s mentioned, for example, that he usually goes with Renee in the canoe – implying the other kids keep their distance. However, he knows that’s not the way forward. Although he’s aware putting her with someone else will make her uneasy – because making the slightest change to an Autistic person’s routine can do that – he wants to ease her out of her comfort zone. That way, she’ll be more willing to try new experiences. He also wants Marcus to get along with different kinds of people. It’s a learning experience for both kids.

Out on the lake, things are challenging for Marcus and Renee. At first, Marcus tries speaking to her like any other teenager. But he quickly realises that’s not going to work. She’s too focused on something ahead, keeps listening to her ringtone and doesn’t take notice of him. But it’s not because she’s ignoring him; it’s how her mind processes what’s around her.

As I alluded to before, there are times when we’re shown Renee’s point of view directly through her eyes. Whenever that happens, almost everything we see becomes light and blurry. It emphasises how Renee struggles to focus on anything that isn’t at the centre of her attention. She prefers to concentrate on things she’s familiar with and for everything else to be quiet. 

That being said, there are also moments when she’s overly sensitive to her surroundings. For example, as Marcus tries speaking again, his voice sounds like a distant echo to Renee. She’s still fixated on something else, so his words aren’t processed very well. Meanwhile, sounds such as Marcus knocking his paddle or sniffing are magnified in volume. To almost any other person, these sounds would barely register. But for Renee, they’re so sudden and unexpected that it shocks her attention to them. It’s usually louder and scarier noises that set her off.

I can think of one other time I’ve seen something that displays an Autistic person’s perspective so efficiently. Several years ago, I attended an Autism Awareness convention in London. While there, a tech company showed me a video program they’d made on a virtual reality headset. Watching the video, you’re looking through the eyes of a boy who’s at a regular shopping centre with his mum. The mother tells you to wait while she does something at a counter. There’s nothing unusual about that. But then things start to happen around you. Footsteps, ringing mobiles, people talking; all these everyday sounds are made much louder in the video, and you can even see the vibrations emanating off them. Eventually, you’re being overwhelmed by so many sounds you can’t help looking around at where they’re all coming from. By this point, the mother has returned and is trying to ask you what’s wrong. But you barely notice her because you’re still trying to locate all the sounds. Soon it becomes too much to bear, and the footage blacks out. For anyone who’s not highly Autistic, this video shows exactly what kind of stress those people experience almost every day.

Now, to be clear, although Renee finds it hard to process what people say, that doesn’t mean she can’t understand them at all. She does, for example, register when Marcus asks her what she wants to do. It seems she wants to tell him something but can’t express it in words. So instead, she looks around, groaning and breathing heavily, as if trying to find some other way of letting him know.

Assuming Renee can’t think of anything, Marcus decides they’ll do a quick paddle around and then get her back to camp. She seems fine with what he says at first. But then he starts talking too fast and spinning the canoe in a circle. The movement freaks her out, and she begins physically rocking the boat from side to side – almost tipping them over. Marcus understands and stops to try and calm Renee down. He suggests taking her back to camp. But that only sets her off rocking the canoe again. It’s not what she wants. 

As the scene progresses, we can see Marcus is getting more frustrated. It’s understandable why. He has no idea how Renee will react to anything he says or does, and it might end up being dangerous. Even so, he manages to stay calm and asks her what she wants again. Once more, his voice sounds like an echo to Renee. She doesn’t even look at him when he speaks because she’s anticipating another noise to happen somewhere. She does, however, pick up on something he says: if she wants to do something specific, she’s got to help him out.

That’s when Renee gets an idea. She shows Marcus a ‘poop’ emoji on her phone. He’s confused at first, but then he notices some portable outhouses on a nearby riverbank. Renee somewhat gestures at them too, and he realises that’s where she wants to head. Smiling, he begins slowly paddling over.

I want to say, at this point, how much I admire the short for highlighting technology as a means of communication; many video programs and applications are being made nowadays to help Autistic people develop life skills. Going back to the time I visited a special needs school, there was a boy there who was just as non-verbal as Renee. To help him communicate, the care workers gave him an iPad with an application that spoke simple sentences. All he had to do was remember the right combination of buttons they’d taught him, and he could let them know how he was feeling or what he wanted at any given time. It was a simple repetitive action that helped make all the difference.

Repetitiveness is also shown in Renee. As she and Marcus approach the riverbank, they pass by some water reeds. Renee reaches out because she likes how they feel on her skin. It’s then Marcus realises she never wanted to use the restrooms at all. Renee only wanted to go through the reeds and used the emoji to clue him in on the direction. After passing through them several times, Renee starts listening to her ringtone over and over again. Seeing how much she enjoys it, Marcus has an idea. 

It’s clear by now the ringtone is a source of comfort for Renee. Unlike many other sounds, it’s one she has control over and likes hearing. It’s similar to me in a way. When working on long articles like this one, I sometimes have to stop for a few minutes and watch short videos online. It gives me a brief moment of entertainment, so I’m not overwhelmed by the workload and can reset my focus. Other people listen to music or play games for similar results. Everyone needs something they’re familiar with to guide them along.

Marcus paddles the canoe inside a large sewer pipe. The confined space echoes the sound of Renee’s ringtone, which seems to please her. Marcus admits he likes it in there, too: “[it’s] a good place to be when there’s too much other stuff happening out there.” 

So perhaps Marcus does understand Renee a little. This dialogue implies he knows what it’s like to be overwhelmed by problems in the outside world. He thinks it might be an idea if they stay there a while, so Renee doesn’t have to deal with sensory overload.

Suddenly there’s a problem. Renee hears the sound of a speedboat approaching outside. Terrified of the monstrous noise being amplified within the pipe, she frantically paddles for the exit. Marcus doesn’t seem to understand and tries fighting against it. He steers them clear of the oncoming boat, but the force of his paddling knocks them both ashore with the canoe. He demands to know why Renee did that. But Renee has gone into a complete meltdown. She cries out in fear and rage, refuses to let Marcus touch her, and even throws her phone in the water by accident. She then hides under the canoe, still crying and trying to block out everything around her.

I respect the short for not shying away from this drama; sometimes, no matter how cautious you are, an Autistic person will have emotional breakdowns. And they will be challenging to deal with because you don’t know how that person will act in their state. However, when they do occur, it’s essential to stay calm and work out the cause of stress so you can put them at ease.

Marcus immediately realises his mistake. But rather than do anything that might worsen the situation, he leaves Renee to calm down. A long time passes, and she still hasn’t come out. So he sits down to talk to her. He admits that she’s an “intense” person to deal with at times. But he “messed up” by shouting at her. He doesn’t always know what to do – not like their councillor – but he understands he needs to be patient. 

I love how Marcus is honest in this scene; of course, he wouldn’t know what to do in this situation; it’s a first-time experience for him. And someone like Renee would intimidate him at first; he isn’t familiar with how her condition makes her behave. But the experience is meant to be a realistic one for the audience. It’s something they can learn from along with Marcus. 

Eventually, Renee comes out and plays with the water reed that Marcus left her. Marcus copies the sound of her ringtone, and she repeats it back to him. It’s then that she finally looks at him and gives him a half-smile. With everything calm now, and the sun beginning to set, they both get back in the canoe and paddle towards camp. In a post-credits scene, it’s revealed they’ve stayed in contact and occasionally go canoeing together still.

And that’s Disney Pixar’s Loop. In summary, it does an excellent job of representing non-verbal Autistic people. Not to mention what first interactions with them could be like for others. The plot may not have much of a set-up, and the ending is a little ambiguous. But Renee’s condition is always at the forefront of the story. Whether it’s her facial expressions, her unique point of view or her emotional outbursts, the animators did everything they could to make sure Renee was portrayed accurately – which isn’t surprising considering they consulted the Autistic Self Advocacy Network (ASAN). Even if I went into this not knowing about Renee’s condition, it would still be clear to me that she’s on the spectrum.

So yes, it goes without saying that I believe Renee is highly Autistic. However, I also can’t stress how appealing this 8-minute short is. My descriptions don’t even begin to do it justice. So, if you have Disney+ and ever get a spare moment, definitely watch it for yourselves. You might find it teaches empathy in ways you never could’ve imagined.

That’s all I have to say. If you have any questions, please leave me a comment below. And, until next time, stay tuned.

PS. I am still recovering from having Covid 19, but I think I’m past the worst of it. Also, I’d like to give a special thank you to Wendy Jones. She commented on my last post and asked if I’d like my blog to be included on her list of resources, which she provides to parents to help share Autism with their children. I’m always happy to share my work with others.

Image courtesy of: https://thewaltdisneycompany.com/pixar-sparkshort-loop-promotes-autism-acceptance-celebrates-difference-and-helps-inspire-change/

Are They Autistic? – Haruhi (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya) – Part 2

(Continued from Part 1: Are They Autistic? – Haruhi (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya) – Part 1 | The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com))

Going back to the first (chronological) episode, Haruhi is frustrated at the school not having any exciting clubs. That’s when Kyon speaks up. He tells her people who aren’t satisfied with what they have usually invented things. For example, planes, cars and trains, were created by people who wanted to fly or get to places faster. What they have today wouldn’t exist if people hadn’t used their talents or imaginations to fulfil their desires. His speech unintentionally gives Haruhi the idea to start a club herself. She’s so enthusiastic that she pulls Kyon from his desk and exclaims about it to him – not realising they’re still in the middle of class. I should mention as well this is the first time we’ve seen Haruhi smiling. Before now, she’s always had a bored, pouty expression on her face, as if frustrated at the world. Like with Maud Pie (Friendship is Magic), you know you’ve done something special if you’ve made Haruhi smile.

After class, Haruhi wants Kyon to help her make her club. She’ll find a room and members while he handles the paperwork. The problem is there are rules to starting an extracurricular group. The club must have at least five members, a supervising teacher, a name, a person in charge, and a purpose for the organisation. Haruhi doesn’t even know what her club will be yet. So Kyon can’t explain to the school board how it’ll benefit the student body. 

To tell the truth, I’ve never been thrilled about documents or paperwork either. I know filling them out is essential. But it’s a lot of information to take in. Plus, my Autism doesn’t make processing it any easier. I’d much rather have someone else handle these tedious parts, so I can focus on what comes afterwards. Maybe that’s Haruhi’s mindset as well.

Despite her lack of forethought, Haruhi does manage to find a room. It belongs to the literary club, but its senior members have all graduated. The only person left is a freshman named Yuki Nagato. And since she can’t maintain the club herself, it’ll soon be disbanded. Nonetheless, Haruhi lets Yuki stay as part of their club since she only wants a place to read. She doesn’t even mind if she will have to leave eventually.

On a side note, I have to mention Yuki’s demeanour. She’s a quiet and unemotional person. At one point, Kyon asks her about the book she’s reading. But she only shows him the front cover and doesn’t say much about whether she likes it. Actually, she barely responds to anything at all. It got me thinking that maybe she was Autistic, too. After all, her habit of quietly reading was what I did all the time in my later years at secondary school. Unfortunately, though, my assumption was false. Yuki isn’t emotionally detached because she’s on the spectrum. It’s because (unlike Haruhi) she isn’t human. She’s a robot. Specifically, an alien robot who’s been sent to observe Haruhi because a higher intergalactic entity believes she’s the key to human evolution – I told you this series gets complicated.

Another member Haruhi finds is Mikuru Asahina, a timid girl who’s dragged to the clubroom against her will. While “walk[ing] every inch of the main building“, Haruhi sometimes encounters Mikuru. She wants her to join because she’s a cutie, has big breasts and is a total moe. Supposedly, all stories with strange things going on have a moe character; “someone with glasses, or in a maid costume, or anything fetishy.” So basically, she wants Mikuru to be the club’s mascot.

Two things Haruhi said resonated with me here. The first is what she mentions doing at break times. When I was younger, I never had anyone to talk to or play with on the playground; I just preferred my own company. I’d spend my free time wandering around, letting my imagination entertain me. We know Haruhi isn’t usually one to sit and talk to people either. So it makes sense she’d do something similar. The second point is her grounds for recruiting Mikuru. It’s alluded to several times in the series, but Haruhi often views her classmates as objects rather than people. That’s why she’s so unfeeling towards them. She doesn’t care who Mikuru is or what she wants. All that matters is what she looks like and how that conforms to a role Haruhi wants fulfilling. She’s trying to make her club the most ideal it can be, based on her interests.

On another side note, Mikuru seemingly joins because she’s pressured into it. However, there’s a second reason. It’s revealed later on she’s a time-traveller who’s also observing Haruhi. And yes, in case you’re wondering, an esper turns up too; he’s a transfer student named Itsuki Koizumi – Haruhi recruits him because he’s mysterious. Ironically enough, when Haruhi reveals the purpose of her club, which she calls the SOS Brigade, one of its objectives is to find aliens, time-travellers and espers. She never works out that these people are right there in her clubroom.

I’ve now covered the entire first (chronological) episode. I could end off right here. But to fully understand Haruhi’s character, I need to discuss a few more episodes. 

First of all, remember what I said about Haruhi being viewed as a model pupil? Well, the keyword in that sentence is “viewed“. Although she’s smart, multi-talented, and does well to represent the Autistic spectrum, she, unfortunately, isn’t a good role model. Why? Because of her personality. You might’ve noticed it already, but Haruhi can be very stubborn at times. She’s the type of person who has to have everything done her way and doesn’t like being told no. If things don’t go according to her plan, something can flare inside her. For Autistic people, like me, sometimes we get overly stressed, angry or depressed. For Haruhi, she can be all of that. Plus, give up on reality and unknowingly use her powers to destroy the world while creating a new one – I’m getting side-tracked again. The point is, once she sets her mind on something, she’ll do anything and everything to make it happen. This attitude not only makes her frustrating at times, but it’s lead to some very unlawful behaviour. A good example is the second (chronological) episode.

Haruhi wants to get a computer for her clubroom, so she goes to the computer club. When the club members protest, she makes it look like their president sexually assaulted Mikuru by taking a forged photograph. She then threatens to show the school board unless they fork over their latest model. She even blackmails them into setting it up while Kyon designs the SOS Brigade’s website. If you think that’s bad, she’s even more of a bully to Mikuru. 

It should be evident that miss Asahina is extremely sensitive. She’s easily reduced to tears and can’t speak up for herself. Despite that, though, Haruhi puts her through all kinds of traumatising experiences. For example, she has her wear many embarrassing outfits; a maid costume, a cheerleading uniform, a bunny girl suit, etc. Haruhi sometimes wears these clothes herself. But she’s insistent on Mikuru dressing this way – even if it means forcibly stripping her! To make matters worse, she takes humiliating pictures of Mikuru and considers posting them online to get her website more views. Oh, and did I mention there’s also an episode where Haruhi drugs her?!

It’s times like these when the series is lucky to have Kyon around. Haruhi doesn’t always listen to him. But he’s able to talk her out of more serious situations. Itsuki believes it’s because they share a bond neither of them cares to admit. I, personally, think there’s some truth to that. Keep in mind, Kyon was the first person Haruhi felt confident speaking to at North High. She might not show it so well (given her Autism), but she does appreciate his company. It’s why she at least considers listening to his suggestions. Kyon also helps with improving her attitude. Although Haruhi never drops her bossy persona entirely, she does gradually start treating others better. One episode highlighting this takes place during the school’s cultural festival.

While handing out fliers, Haruhi notices two girls arguing with the festival operations committee. Their band can’t perform because two of their members had to pull out with tonsillitis and injury. Worse still, this was going to be their last performance together. Since Haruhi has experience being part of the school’s rock club for a while, she offers to fill in as lead singer and guitarist. Amazingly, despite having only an hour to prepare, she gives a near-perfect performance, which leaves everybody stunned – including Kyon. What I love most about this moment, though, is Haruhi isn’t her narcissistic self. She makes it clear she’s only filling in and asks the audience to buy copies of the original songs with the actual music and vocals. She wants to make sure the right people get the recognition. It’s a selfless act on her part, but the episode delves further into her character.

Later on, the band members come to thank Haruhi for saving their festival memories. However, she feels awkward talking to them. So she insists that Kyon stands with her. I like this detail because it shows she still has social problems and needs somebody she trusts to help her. Kyon also realises Haruhi isn’t used to being appreciated by others. 

Later still, it’s revealed Haruhi hated her near-perfect performance because they had to simplify the songs. If she’d had one more day of practice, she feels she could’ve nailed it. So it seems Haruhi is a perfectionist, too – something I know all too well when it comes to writing.

At this point, I’ve covered nearly everything the series has to offer about Haruhi. However, there is one more aspect that defines her having Autism. It’s not one specific episode but a whole collection of them. It’s now time I talk about this anime’s most infamous story arc: The Endless Eight.

Beginning with season two’s second episode: the SOS Brigade is shown enjoying their last two weeks of summer vacation. They go to a public swimming pool, see some fireworks, play a few sports, and do all sorts of fun things together. However, something is off in the next episode. The characters are shown doing the same things again. All that’s different are some minor dialogue changes and one additional scene. Then the next episode is the same. And then the next, and the next, and the next. It turns out this is Haruhi’s doing. She has a subconscious desire for summer never to end. As such, she’s unknowingly used her powers to create an infinite time loop. Kyon and the others can’t escape it, and everyone has their memories reset each time. Also, this problem isn’t resolved in just a few episodes. It takes place over eight of them. Do you know what that means? People had to watch practically the same episode for eight consecutive weeks! 

As you can imagine, no one was happy with this stunt. In fact, the studio had to make a public apology for it. That being said, I think the arc is a brilliant reflection of having Autism. Let me explain.

We all know changes in life can be difficult. It would be so much easier to enjoy only the finer things it offers. Inevitably, though, we have to work our way through some challenging new experiences. These experiences are especially tough on people with Autism. We’re so used to routines and doing things a certain way that it’s how we make sense of the world. If that familiarity suddenly goes away, it can be scary and distressing. Haruhi doesn’t know if she can face another school term. So she keeps willing her summer to continue. It’s moments like this when she once again needs the help of her Brigade. 

Do you know how Kyon ends the time loop? He suggests everyone does their summer homework together. I’m not kidding. He realises Haruhi has never had this experience before. She’s so intelligent she usually finishes it quickly and alone. It’s a chance for her to bond with the SOS Brigade and create a unique summer memory. Haruhi acts like she’s sour about it, but she’s secretly grateful. And after sitting in on the study group, she’s finally satisfied with her summer vacation and has the strength to move on.

So yes, The Endless Eight is a tedious arc. I, honestly, think its message could’ve been delivered in just three or four episodes. However, with everything it emphasises, I have to admire its repetitive nature. Besides, compared to how many times I read and review my writing – there’s no comparison.

With that said, I’m glad to say we’ve finished my analogy. I’m sorry this ended up being longer than expected. It’s the first time I’ve reviewed the main character of a series. In case it’s not obvious, I do believe Haruhi is Autistic. She might not have learning difficulties or frequent social anxieties, but the similarities between her and myself are uncanny. The repetitive behaviour, the eccentricity, the occasional stubbornness, it’s all here. I will admit she’s not the most likeable character ever. Especially when she’s a whiny brat, acts like a bully or does something illegal. But I can’t say she’s hateable – just misguided. As I said, I’ve made many of the same social mistakes she has. Plus, she does have redeeming qualities and tries to be a better person. Sometimes that’s all that matters.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this instalment of Are They Autistic? If you have any ideas for characters you’d like to see reviewed in this series, please let me know in the comments below. Until next time, stay tuned.

Image courtesy of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya – Anime Review | Nefarious Reviews

Are They Autistic? – Haruhi (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya) – Part 1

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger). Welcome to another instalment of Are They Autistic?: the series where I look at characters from various forms of media and analyse whether I think they’re on the spectrum or not.

Today we’re going to be looking at a character from the anime series, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya (Ha-roo-ey Soo-zoo-me-ya). There were several reasons why I was interested in this series. First of all, it’s referenced numerous times in another anime called Lucky Star; one of the characters sometimes cosplays as Haruhi, and they even share the same voice actress (both in the Japanese and English dub). The second reason is Melancholy has one of the most infamous arcs in all of anime – I’ll talk about that when I get to it. But third, and most importantly, what drew me in was Haruhi herself. On several reviews of the series, it’s theorised that her character may be Autistic. There was evidence supporting these claims, such as her poor social skills and repetitive behaviour. But it got me wondering. Was Haruhi Autistic? Or could her quirks be explained through other means, like with the Bookworm’s in Batman (the 60s series)? It only took me one episode to find my answer.

I should mention now this is a rather complicated series – least of all because the episodes didn’t initially air in chronological order. The first story arc begins simply enough. But then it introduces time travel, aliens and alternate dimensions. Furthermore, there’s a subplot involving Haruhi supposedly having the power to bend reality. I was worried this would make the character harder to analyse – since she might not be a regular human. But luckily, there was a saving grace. It’s made abundantly clear that Haruhi isn’t aware of her godlike powers, which means they don’t influence her mindset or personality. That being said, other aspects do have major ramifications. I don’t want to get too side-tracked by these. So, for now, I won’t talk about anything beyond the first (chronological) episode – unless I need to make a point about something. With that said, let’s indulge in The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.

The first (chronological) episode begins with our main protagonist: Kyon. An average high school boy, he’s never been one to believe in the supernatural: not ghosts, monsters, evil syndicates, nothing like that. He would like to believe in them. But he knows the laws of reality pretty much make them impossible. However, he’s okay with that. He accepts the world for what it is and leads a generally satisfying life. Everything changes on his first day at North High, though. 

As everybody makes their classroom introductions, a girl behind Kyon stands up and says something strange. She tells everyone she’s “not interested in ordinary people.” But if any of them are aliens, time-travellers or espers, she wants to see them. That’s all. Everybody, of course, thinks she’s joking around. But Kyon can tell from her expression that she’s dead serious. This is Haruhi Suzumiya.

Over the next few days, Kyon learns more about his new classmate. Apparently, Haruhi was known for doing some “beyond eccentric” things in junior high; she drew mysterious symbols on the school quad, pushed all the desks out into the hallway, and plastered resurrection talismans all over campus. Furthermore, she wasn’t the least bit ashamed to admit she was responsible.

Straightaway, I could see what those online reviews were talking about; it’s not uncommon for Autistic people to act a little eccentric sometimes. I remember doing some outlandish things myself when I was Haruhi’s age. For example, when playing sports, I’d always celebrate scoring by doing a cross-chop near my groin – like I’d seen wrestlers do on TV. I’d also start freestyle rapping at anyone who tried picking on me, just to throw them off. I didn’t see anything wrong with what I was doing. But that’s because I didn’t consider what it must’ve looked like to others. If they didn’t understand my thought process, then my behaviours would’ve seemed weirdly random. Sometimes you can only judge someone by their actions and not their intentions. What I’m saying is, everybody has their reasons for doing things. It takes more than eccentricity to define someone as Autistic. 

On that note, the series does a fine job balancing out Haruhi’s character. It shows us there’s more to her than just these behaviours. For one thing, she’s extremely popular with the boys because they think she’s pretty. She has been on dates before, but her relationships never last long. Additionally, she’s skilled in almost every sport and tends to get good grades in class. Plus, it’s revealed later in the series that she’s a fast learner, plays various instruments and is a talented singer. So Haruhi isn’t ditsy, lazy or even rebellious. In some ways, you could view her as a model pupil. One of Kyon’s friends puts it best: “she’s a super weirdo, but if she’s standing there quietly, you’d never know.“

So far, I wasn’t seeing or hearing anything that confirmed Haruhi was on the spectrum. I just saw a beautiful, talented girl who had some unusual habits and interests. What did sway me, however, was when Kyon described some of her other behaviours.

The first thing he notices is Haruhi has a different hairstyle every day. On Mondays, she wears a hair accessory but doesn’t tie it up. On Tuesdays, she ties it up in one place. On Wednesdays, it’s tied in two areas; on Thursdays, it’s three, and so on. Additionally, the colour of the accessories change as well; Mondays they’re yellow, Tuesdays they’re red, Wednesdays they’re blue, etc.

This habit alone is what convinced me Haruhi was Autistic. I used to do something similar with the socks I wore. Sometimes I’d have black ones with different days of the week printed on them. So I felt obligated to wear them on those days. Even when they didn’t have the days, though, I’d wear pairs based on the colours they had. If they were red, I’d wear them on Mondays. If they had blue, I’d wear them Tuesdays. Yellow was for Wednesday, green was for Thursday, and Friday was whatever colour was leftover. I knew it didn’t matter what socks I wore. But it never felt right wearing red Monday socks on a Friday.

Another strange habit Kyon observes is Haruhi’s lack of decency. For example, when getting changed for PE class, the girls are meant to wait for the boys to leave the room so everyone can dress separately. Haruhi, however, begins stripping off regardless of who’s still in there. In other words, she doesn’t read the room or consider how her actions might make others uncomfortable. As mentioned above, I’ve been guilty of this notion myself.

Haruhi’s third unusual habit is her wavering interests. During the first term of school, she’d signed up for every sports team and extracurricular club that North High had to offer. She excels in every one of them but never remains a member for long. In fact, she changes clubs daily, based on her mood, and never signs up full-time – no matter how much the other members beg her.

I was personally never into clubs myself. But I understand Haruhi’s experience. I took part in gym, football, and karate classes but never had any real passion for them. As for wavering interests, that’s something I know all too well. When you have Autism, it’s hard staying focused on one thing – even if it’s something you enjoy. Your mind inevitably wanders to other things that might be more exciting at the time. For example, while writing this piece, I’m thinking of better ways to spend my free time. I do love writing and try to finish by set deadlines. But sometimes, my heart and mind aren’t into it. Maybe that’s what Haruhi goes through. Perhaps she changes clubs daily because she wants to get fresh excitement out of every day without being tied to one thing. Patience is a virtue, but commitment can feel daunting.

By this point, the episode hadn’t even lasted 10mins. And I was already convinced that Haruhi had Autism. Even so, the series continues solidifying the fact. Not just through Haruhi’s actions, but the main protagonist’s too.

One morning, Kyon notices Haruhi has her hair tied in two places (meaning it’s a Wednesday). When he asks if she does this to “ward off alien invaders or something“, Haruhi isn’t offended by the question. Instead, she opens up about why she changes it. She has this theory that “each day of the week has its own image with a specific colour that only goes with that day.” Hence why she wears yellow hair accessories on Monday, red ones on Tuesday, and so on. Kyon also works out that she ties her hair based on the number she thinks represents that day: Monday being 0, Tuesday being 1, etc. However, he finds it odd that she counts from 0 instead of 1.

What’s important to note is how Kyon approaches talking with Haruhi. Initially, he tried speaking to her during the first week of school. But when he asked if she was serious about aliens and such, she could tell he thought she was weird. So she rudely brushed him off. In this case, though, Kyon shows genuine interest in her mindset and wants to know why she does the things she does. Haruhi realises that, so she feels more comfortable talking to him. The reason I bring this up is it demonstrates the proper way of interacting with Autistic people.

When you have Autism, you tend to have very specific interests. So it can be challenging taking part in conversations. Especially if the subject isn’t something that you’re familiar with. People may try to include you in discussions – which they should – but sometimes that can make matters worse. You feel like you’re being put on the spot. Plus, if you don’t have a good enough response, you might look unsociable, which will make the situation more awkward.

On the other hand, it’s the same if you try starting a conversation. Of course, you can only talk passionately about the things you love. But because they’re so specific, not many people will understand them. If that’s the case, you’ll end up being a conversation of one. That’s why most Autistic people wait for others to include them in discussions. Not because they can’t speak up. But because it’s hard finding the right opening.

Kyon takes all the proper steps with Haruhi. Over several weeks, he’s carefully observed her and picked up on most of her interests. Since she’s not sure if anyone shares these interests, Kyon makes the first move: he brings up aliens in his question to show he’s approachable. It gives Haruhi a chance to express herself, knowing Kyon won’t judge her too heavily. True, her communication skills aren’t the best – she doesn’t even look at Kyon most of the time she’s talking. But it’s still a step in the right direction. If repeated regularly, this strategy can help someone like Haruhi speak with confidence to someone like Kyon. He can then gradually encourage her to talk about subjects outside of her comfort zone. It’s a slow but sure way of improving her social skills.

Kyon’s interactions seem to have immediate effects on Haruhi – if a little drastic. The day after commenting on her hair, she’s suddenly cut it shorter and doesn’t follow her styling patterns anymore. Kyon thinks it’s because she’s feeling self-conscious about him noticing. Despite that, though, she quickly begins a new “ritual“. Every day, before homeroom, she talks to him at their desks. Through these conversations, Kyon learns more about her. Haruhi admits to dumping every guy she’s ever dated because they took themselves too seriously. Plus, none of them was an alien, time-traveller or esper. It’s similar to the clubs she’s attended. There were a few she took an interest in, like those based around mysteries and the supernatural. However, they were all major letdowns. The members were just “mystery novel otakus” or “occult freaks” who were nowhere near professional level. Kyon doesn’t approve of everything Haruhi says, but he decides to agree with her. It’s best to stay in her good graces if he wants to keep her talking.

Kyon’s efforts don’t go unnoticed by his classmates. According to them, he’s the only one who can get Haruhi to talk for so long. With everyone else, she usually stays quiet and doesn’t answer questions. They’re glad he’s helping her open up a bit. Although, it’s not all smooth sailing. 

As time goes by, it becomes apparent that Haruhi only has one goal in life: to lead an interesting existence. Nothing else matters to her, as long as she can stand out from ordinary people. The fifth (chronological) episode explains why.

Haruhi recounts a day when she found out her life was insignificant. Back in the sixth grade, she went to a baseball game with her family. What astounded her was how many people were packed into the stadium: it was around 50,000. Later on, she worked out it was only a tiny fraction of the people in Japan. And an even smaller fraction of the world’s population. She was just one little person in that enormous crowd, which, itself, was nothing but a tiny spec. Following that day, Haruhi’s life became grey and depressing. She’d always believed she’d had an extraordinary life. But knowing how many people there were in the world, she realised that wasn’t true. There were billions of people who lived the same kind of life she did every day. There was nothing special about her at all. After that, everything became boring. Activities with her friends and family no longer had significance. She was just – another person. That’s why she became obsessed with living an extraordinary life. She wants to be that one person in a million who is interesting. She can’t stand and wait for change. She has to make it happen herself. It’s the only way she’ll be satisfied with her existence.

It goes without saying, but this moment was a series highlight for me. Everything Haruhi says is understandable. However, it also reveals a deeper meaning to her eccentricity; she acts this way to be fulfilled. With that in mind, it’s no surprise what she sets out to do in the series.

(Continued in Part 2: Are They Autistic? – Haruhi (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya) – Part 2 | The Autistic Blogger (wordpress.com))

Image courtesy of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya – Anime Review | Nefarious Reviews

Are They Autistic? – The Bookworm (Batman)

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger). Welcome to another instalment of Are They Autistic? – the series where I look at characters from various forms of media and analyse whether I think they’re on the spectrum or not. It doesn’t matter if they’ve never been confirmed to have Autism; as long as they show similar traits, I’ll be talking about them. Please remember these are only my personal opinions. If you think somebody you know has the condition, it’s always best to consult a professional. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this piece.

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Today we’ll be analysing a character you’ve probably never heard of before. Even if you’re a die-hard Batman fan, chances are you don’t remember this villain. He only made one notable TV appearance and a handful of cameos across other Batman media. That appearance was in the 1960s Batman series (starring Adam West), and his name was the Bookworm.

Played by Roddy McDowall, what stood out to me about Bookworm was the way his mind functioned. There have been more entertaining villains than him on the show – like my personal favourite: Frank Gorshin’s the Riddler. However, this character struck me as someone abnormally obsessed with his interests. He doesn’t just love books; they’re practically his whole life. They inspire everything he says and does. He can even quote lines from a particular piece and tell you exactly which chapter and passage they’re from – he has that strong of a memory.

In a way, it’s similar to me. When I see or hear something I enjoy, I make a mental note of it. I can then playback the memory of it with almost pinpoint accuracy. My earliest recollection of doing this was during primary school. There was a story I heard so often I could retell it, word for word, without even needing the book. I can’t do it now, but other memories have stuck with me for years – if you’ve read Into My Autistic Mind you know what I mean.

For the longest time, I assumed Bookworm’s obsessive memory was evidence that he was Autistic. However, now I’m not so sure. There are similarities between myself and Bookworm – evilness not being one of them – but does that mean he has Autism? That’s what we’re here to find out. So let’s review his two-parter: “The Bookworm Turns” / “While Gotham City Burns” (1966).

***

The story begins with the opening of a new bridge in Gotham City. Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson (Batman and Robin) are watching the event on TV, when Dick suddenly notices someone in the crowd: a man wearing large, goggle-like spectacles; a brown leather coat, and a hat with a lamp attached – the Bookworm. Soon after, the villain orders his minions to “begin Chapter One“, and Police Commissioner Gordon is seemingly shot dead off the bridge. Horrified, Bruce and Dick immediately jump into action as Batman and Robin. 

Driving to the police station, however, everyone is relieved to discover that Commissioner Gordon is alive. He wasn’t even at the ceremony. Hilariously, one of his officers had fined him for over-parking, and he was late. Or so it seemed. It turns out, not only was there a fake commissioner at the bridge, the parking officer was an imposter too. It was all so Bookworm could lure Batman to the police station and plant a bomb in the Batmobile. Additionally, the commissioner’s parking ticket reads “A.S. Scarlett, Badge #1887” – a reference to “A Study In Scarlett” (the first Sherlock Holmes novel) published in 1887.

In these first few scenes, Bookworm’s obsessions are on full display. Like most Batman villains, his crimes and antics are based around his gimmick; in this case, books. He describes part of his plan as “Plot A“, the bomb he uses is disguised as a book, and even his henchmen have literary-based names: Pressman, Printer’s Devil, Typesetter and Lydia Limpet. However, there’s more to him than his theming – as we soon learn.

Batman is alerted to the bomb in the Batmobile and ejects it before detonation. He and Robin investigate the crime scene, only finding the charred remains of the book and its title: For Whom the Bell Tolls, by Earnest Hemmingway. At this point, Batman reveals another side of their foe’s mentality. 

You see (much like the Riddler) Bookworm leaves clues for Batman and Robin, to see if they can work out his next move. While this might seem foolish, it actually ties into a philosophy several Batman villains have. It’s not enough to defeat the caped crusader. They want to out-wit him too. Batman is one of the most renowned detectives on the planet. So if they come up with a scheme not even he can deduce, it’ll prove once and for all they’re his intellectual superior. Besides that, if he does work it out, it’s still a chance to lure him into a trap. I’ll admit, sometimes I like to show off in this way too. I love giving people conundrums to see if they can work out the answers to things I’ve cleverly learned. It’s a little shameless, but I accept it.

After concluding Bookworm’s plan might be to blow up a bridge – since that’s the plot of For Whom the Bell Tolls – Batman and Robin race off to their next location. We then transition to what might be the most memorable scene of the story for me. It’s here we learn the extent of Bookworm’s knowledge and the price he has to pay for it. 

In the villain’s hideout, Bookworm marvels at his collection of books. He loves the ideas they contain, the wisdom they provide; how each one is perfectly structured to relay a mountain of knowledge from the great minds who wrote them. He’s spent a lifetime memorising their plots and using them as his greatest weapon. Unfortunately, it’s also his greatest curse. When Lydia asks Bookworm why he doesn’t write a best-seller of his own, he suddenly becomes furious. The sad truth is, he can’t come up with anything original. He’s so engrossed in the works of others that he’d just be copying their ideas. That’s why his schemes are plot-based. He couldn’t make a plan of his own if he wanted to. 

Hearing this for the first time, I couldn’t help drawing comparisons with myself. Being an inspiring writer, I know the challenge of coming up with original ideas. Inevitably, you start looking at other people’s work for inspiration. But sometimes you take so much you end up plagiarising. It happened so often when I was asked to write an original story, only to copy characters and plots from elsewhere. It certainly shakes your confidence somewhat, knowing you might only be good at retelling stories.

To quickly summarise the next several scenes. Bookworm manages to calm himself by reading an entire book (The Secret of Success: Self Control) in a matter of seconds. Batman and Robin arrive at their next location, but discover Bookworm has already “blown up” a bridge; he’s projected the enlarged image of one on the side of a building. The Dynamic Duo climb higher to get a better view of their surroundings – meeting Jerry Lewis along the way – before encountering Bookworm’s henchmen. After defeating them in a fight, they receive information from Lydia Limpet. However, Batman is curious about something. Robin is left to guard her, but she tricks him into opening a book filled with knockout gas: The History of the English Language – a book that would put anyone to sleep. Bookworm’s henchmen tie Robin to the clapper of a bell just as it’s about to strike midnight. Fortunately, Batman realises he’s been misled. Along with Police Chief O’Hara, they reach the clock tower (Big Benjamin) and use some elaborate science to save Robin. Our heroes then regroup in the Batcave.

I should point out at this stage that Batman’s original series was more family-friendly than its later interpretations. The lighthearted tone could even be described as “campy” at times. For example, Batman employs a pick-up service for the sole purpose of collecting discarded parachutes – which he uses in Bat-U-turns. When he and Robin climb the side of the building, he reminds his sidekick to keep “both hands on the bat-rope“. And, just before they fight Bookworm’s henchmen, he insists the minions remove their glasses first – he would never hit a man with glasses. 

Speaking of which, I always loved the fight scenes on this show. Not only did they capture the spirit of the comics with their onomatopoeia (words on screen), but something about them felt strangely realistic to me. You could tell they were all choreographed. However, the action felt so spontaneous it was like the actors were improvising as they went. The directors must’ve been very skilled to make everything look seamless.

Anyway, back onto Bookworm, I was surprised to find little else to analyse about him. At least, in regards to him potentially being Autistic. He didn’t have any social or communication problems, and none of his quirks seemed ritualistic, i.e. when your mind is conditioned to make you do something a certain elaborate way. The only exception I could find was in the latter half of the story. Let me explain.

First, Bookworm enters Wayne Manor pretending to be a book salesman. He uses another knockout book (The Congressional Record March 1919) on Alfred Pennyworth and Harriet Cooper – the butler and Dick’s aunt respectively – allowing him to steal a rare text from Bruce’s collection. However, that’s not enough. He then places a giant cookbook (The Delight of Cooking) in the middle of a street, luring in Batman and Robin. It’s here Batman reveals another of Bookworm’s mindsets: his over-plotting. Either the robbery or the enlarged book would’ve gotten their attention. However, Bookworm insists on creating as big a scene as possible – much like he did with the faked assassination and “blown up” bridge.

The reason I bring all this up is that, once again, I feel Bookworm’s actions relate to me in some way. When I write, I often go overboard with what I’m describing. Sometimes I mention things that perhaps don’t need mentioning or I explain them in extensive detail. It’s hard to remember that quantity doesn’t always equal quality. But I’m so used to seeing it from other people that I’m conditioned to think that it is. Bookworm is the same. He believes the stages of his plan should be big and bold because it’s how he’s seen them in his books. It doesn’t matter if there’s a better solution or if they don’t tie into his main plot.

To finish off the story: Bookworm traps Batman and Robin inside the large cookbook, where another deathtrap awaits. He also steals the Batmobile, hoping to use its gadgets for a grand heist. Fortunately, Batman and Robin escape (thanks to some more elaborate science) and apprehend Bookworm and his henchmen. Later on, Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson are in Commissioner Gordan’s office, with Bruce donating money to the prison library. Bookworm is brought in just before he’s incarcerated and quotes: “They who lose today may win tomorrow.” He believes he’s quoting a poet. However, Bruce points out it’s actually from a book. He even tells Bookworm the part and the chapter. The episode ends with Bookworm wondering if Bruce Wayne is as obnoxious as Batman.

And that’s Bookworm’s two-part story. A typical set of episodes, encompassing everything the series was known for; lighthearted action, campy moral lessons, and a guest villain putting in their best performance. Roddy McDowall did a fine job.

However, I’m sure many of you are still wondering. Do I think Bookworm is Autistic? Well, as much as I’d like to think so, the argument for it isn’t very strong. Keep in mind, these episodes were written in the 60s. It was a different time back then, and Autism was nowhere near as well-known as it is now. It’d be nice to think the writer (Rik Vollaerts) had some knowledge of the condition. However, if he did, it’s not well-presented. There’s no social awkwardness in Bookworm, no learning difficulties or specific quirks. And although there are similarities between myself and him, there could be other explanations for it. For example, Bookworm’s extensive knowledge could be because he has a photographic memory. You also don’t need Autism to be abnormally obsessed with something. I had high hopes for this character when I first saw him. However, given the lack of decisive evidence, I’ve had to conclude that Bookworm isn’t Autistic. Maybe it’s still possible he is, but I can’t say for sure.

That’s all I have for this instalment. I hope you enjoyed it and I hope to bring you more in the future. Before I finish up, though, I have a special request. I’ve been writing this blog for more than five years now, and its viewership has grown immensely throughout 2020. To show my appreciation for this, I want to try something I’ve never done before: take audience requests. At the moment, I have a couple more characters lined up for this series. However, I’d like to hear your ideas too. If there’s a particular character you’ve seen or read about, and you’d like me to review whether they’re on the spectrum or not, leave me a comment about them down below. I’ll do my research and try to bring you an instalment on them in the future. Again, I’m not looking for any characters who’s Autism has already been confirmed. But instead, those you think may have it because of certain traits. I look forward to hearing your recommendations. Until then, stay tuned.

If you like my content be sure to check out my second blog site Autistic Blogger Creates (https://autisticbloggercreates.wordpress.com/blog-2/) and it’s latest posts.

Experimenting with Scriptwriting – https://autisticbloggercreates.wordpress.com/2020/09/03/experimenting-with-scriptwriting-the-nutcracker/

The Nutcracker Panto Script Extract – https://autisticbloggercreates.wordpress.com/2020/09/03/the-nutcracker-panto-script-extract/

(Image courtesy of: https://comicvine.gamespot.com/batman-326-minerva-mayhem-and-millionaires/4070-13966/)

Are They Autistic? – Beth (Rose Rivers)

Hello everybody, this is George Harvey (aka The Autistic Blogger), and today I’ve decided to start a new segment on my blog called Are They Autistic? – inspired by the Channel 4 documentary, Are You Autistic? (2018). In this series, I’ll be looking at characters from various forms of media and analysing whether I think they’re on the spectrum or not. These can include characters from books, TV shows or movies, and it doesn’t matter if their Autism isn’t confirmed. If they display similar traits, I’ll be talking about them.

Now, there are a couple of reasons why I decided to start this series. The first was variety: I’ve been writing this blog for five years now, and I wanted to give my regular viewers something new to read. More often than not, I write long reviews or segments of ‘Into My Autistic Mind‘. While these are engaging, I feel like I’m not challenging myself enough with them. Also, given that I currently work for Lidl – and everything that’s been happening lately – I probably won’t have the spare time to write longer posts. The second reason is for other people’s benefit. I don’t claim to be an expert on Autism. But I have noticed it’s easy for me to recognise Autistic symptoms; most notably in characters like Twilight Sparkle and Maud Pie from Friendship is Magic. If more people are aware of these traits and know how to handle them, it’ll be better for everyone in the long-run. With that said, I hope you enjoy this new series and find it enlightening.

***

The first character I’m going to look at comes from Jacqueline Wilson’s Rose Rivers (2018). For those of you who don’t know; the story follows a 12-year-old, Victorian-era girl, who lives in Kensington with her high-class family. The book aims to show us not only what life was like for these kinds of children, but why Rose is opposed to it. The story also acts as a sequel to Wilson’s 2016 novel, Clover Moon, which focuses on the lives of destitute children. 

Rose, herself, is an intriguing character. But it was her sister, Beth, who caught my attention. Early on, it’s made abundantly clear she’s challenging to deal with; although she’s ten-years-old, she “still cries a great deal…frequently has tantrums…flings herself on the floor and screams and kicks,” (p.21). On top of that, she has some oddly specific interests: “dolls, sparkly things, counting, rocking,” (p.22) and Rose admits she “[doesn’t] know what she’s like inside,” (p.22).

It’s interesting to analyse a character like Beth because Autism wasn’t well-known in the 19th Century. The term didn’t exist back then, and it was more common to refer to such children as being “backward[s]” (p.21) or “imbecile[s]” (p.91). Some doctors even thought “pour souls like her [were] incapable of improvement” (p.91) and should be “[placed] in an asylum” (p.92). Beth’s parents don’t resort to this, but it’s clear they’re fearful and distant of her; “Papa loves Beth and makes a fuss of her sometimes, but he’s certainly not prepared to look after her. Mama rarely goes near Beth, even when she’s quiet and docile” (p.201). 

Of course, having behavioural problems doesn’t mean someone is on the spectrum. And there can be many explanations for delayed emotional development. So, do I think Beth is Autistic? Yes, I do. And here’s why.

The most notable aspect about Beth is her limited speech. Throughout the story, she only ever speaks by repeating what someone says to her. For example: “‘It’s just me, Rose,’ I said. ‘Rose. Rose, Rose, Rose!’ [repeated Beth]” (p.22). Many people will recognise this as echolalia; a habit some Autistic children use to help them communicate and process information. 

“‘Do you remember – he’s at school now,’ I said. ‘At school now,’ Beth agreed. ‘I wish I could go to school,’ I said. ‘Go to school,’ Beth said, as if she wanted to go too” (p.24). 

Not all Autistic children do this, and their speech does tend to improve over time. However, for those on a higher spectrum, it helps them to understand things when they’re the ones saying them.

The story also addresses a common misconception. Children with Autism do have learning difficulties, but it doesn’t mean they’re stupid. In some cases, they’re even smarter than the average person. Rose discovers this firsthand. She used to think her sister only pretended to read, but one day she found her with Pilgrim’s Progress “muttering passages to herself while pointing along the lines” (p.23). Rose admits she finds this book “very heavy going [and] can never read more than a page or two at a time” (p.24). So Beth can read better than her older sibling. Unfortunately, most people only focus on her disruptive side. The problem, I think, is she’s not given a chance to show how bright she is. We find out she’s not allowed to touch books or ink bottles (p.110) because of previous incidents that saw her banned from the household classroom (p.109). As a result; nobody can see her skills in reading or writing – and she has no other creative outlets. As Rose puts it herself: “It must be so boring to be Beth. No wonder she is attached to her dolls.” (p.110)

There are other hints at Beth’s Autism too. These include; not liking to be touched (p.22), having strange habits like licking her fingers and then her dolls’ fingers (p.25), arranging things in size order (p.25), rocking back and forth (p.85/p.277), getting distracted easily (p.298), and “want[ing] to be in her own world,” (p.277). However, the one passage that convinced me, beyond a doubt, was during her Christmas dinner. 

“She whimpered when she was served her vegetables because the carrots and parsnips were heaped on any old how. She likes each item of food to be entirely separate on her plate, and then she eats them in turn” (p.317). 

This behaviour convinced me because it’s what I do. I don’t like experimenting with new food or mixing flavours. If something tastes good one way, I prefer not to change it. I also prefer having one food in my mouth at a time, so I can fully enjoy it – hence why I finish all of one before starting the next. I don’t know if any non-Autistic people do this. But given how closely Beth’s eating habits resembled mine, there was no question my mind she had Autism. Furthermore, it wasn’t just Beth who convinced me. It was the people around her. 

One other character worth mentioning here is Nurse Budd; the “trained professional” Mrs Rivers hires to subdue Beth’s behaviour. A professional would, of course, have been less qualified in those days. And going by this Nurse, it’s clear they didn’t always know how best to handle Autistic children. Let me explain. 

First of all, Nurse Budd describes her methods as “training” (rather than teaching). Just the use of this word shows how poorly-viewed disadvantaged children were in those times – lesser beings who needed conditioning to behave. Additionally, Nurse Budd often keeps Beth in her room and limits interactions with her family. Seclusion and loneliness are already two of the biggest problems with Autism, so they shouldn’t be reinforced. Children should be encouraged to grow their social skills, however tricky. Otherwise, they’ll become reclusive.

Now, to be fair, Nurse Budd does show some understanding of Beth’s condition. She knows she can’t cope with sudden change or surprises (p.68), and that she needs a “regular routine” (p.278) to guide her. Sometimes even I was won over by her methods. However, nothing could excuse her more extreme measures. Honestly, it was shocking to see what people deemed appropriate back then. First, she straps Beth to a chair and force-feeds her when she refuses to eat properly (pp.133-4). Then later at Christmas, she insists on her wearing a bib like a baby. Nurse Budd also claims “never [to] smack any of [her] charges” (p.148) – yet she does so when Beth accidentally tears a dress (p.379). She even seems to take advantage of Beth’s echolalia: “Miss Beth, Nurse Budd never smacks, does she? [Nurse asked.] “Never smacks, does she? [Beth replied]” (p148). 

However, Nurse Budd’s worst crime involves her medicine: Godfrey’s Cordial. Although it’s “so safe it’s recommended for little babies” (p.87), she ignores the dosage instructions; giving it to Beth whenever she’s well-behaved or needs quietening down. Consequently, Beth becomes addicted to the substance and will do anything for more. Her improved behaviour is because her mind is in the wrong place – not because she’s learning. The overdose is so severe in fact that another doctor reveals it could’ve been fatal: “It’s a wonder this child is still standing.” (p.413)

Let me make this quite clear. Drugs and medication are NOT a cure for Autism. Autism is not a disease, and it’s not something that needs correcting. What Autistic children need are carers who are patient, know what they like and dislike, and can implement teaching methods which avoid stress or physicality. That’s why it’s fortunate for the Rivers they have Clover Moon. She takes over Beth’s care towards the end of the book; creating a drawing game which not only keeps her calm, but includes everything she likes, and allows Clover to praise her (pp.427-9). It gives us hope that Beth will eventually recover from her addiction and set herself on the right path.

So there you have it. Almost everything about Beth suggests she had Autism at a difficult time. The story paints a clear picture of how badly treated disadvantaged children were, and how far care and understanding of them have improved over the years. Rose Rivers is a delightful read for the main story, but I think it’s worth experiencing for history’s sake even more.

***

And that’s all I have to say. I hope you enjoyed this first instalment in what will hopefully be a long-running series. If you have any questions or recommendations, please leave me a comment – I’ll be more than happy to answer them. And, until next time, stay safe and stay tuned.

(Jacqueline Wilson, 2018, Rose Rivers, Double Day, Penguin Random House UK)

Into My Autistic Mind: Early Autism Years

By the time I release this post, it will be the New Year. And with a new year comes changes. An old WWE promo with Mankind is going through my head. I’m sure there will be plenty of changes for me this coming year. I really hope I get to make some advancements with my writing. But today I want to talk about a time in my life when things really started to change for me. A time when I started school and my Autism really started to affect me. Now I’m thinking of an Equestria Girls special where the human characters become ponies. I just corrected a spelling error there. Although my iPad doesn’t recognise it. Now I’m typing with both hands instead of just Intel – ‘one‘, not ‘Intel‘, auto-correct! I watched Channel 4‘s adaption of The Tiger Who Came to Tea earlier. I think they unintentionally made the tiger quite scary. Anyway, I don’t remember much of what happened between the time we moved to our new house in Welling, Kent and school. I somewhat remember going upstairs to explore and see if there was anybody up there. I do remember I was terrified of being on my own. I’d always get scared at night and had trouble sleeping in my own room. I didn’t even like being downstairs on my own when everyone else was upstairs or vice-versa. I remember when my sister and I started nursery at Hook Land Primary School I was very shy. Every day they would select one of the children to welcome the parents inside to pick up their kids, and I could barely look at them without being embarrassed. There was a boy like that in an after-school club I volunteered for later in later in my life. Nursery was the only time my sister and I were ever in the same classroom. There was never another point in primary or secondary school where we shared a class or even a homeroom. I think schools prefer to keep twins and siblings separate. But there was another pair of twins in our primary school who were almost always in the same classes. Anyway, now I’m thinking of the opening to Jimmy Neutron (the movie) and The Fairly Odd Parents. I still remember the name of my nursery teacher: Mrs Swane. And I think her classroom assistant was called Miss Doettey – or something like that. I also remember there was a girl in our class who was constantly disruptive. I think her name was Michele or Rachel, and she was always getting into trouble for doing things like crawling under tables. I don’t think I ever remember her talking. I do, however, remember she had to leave our class for some reason and she kissed everyone goodbye. It was the most behaved I’d ever seen her. Now that I think about it, I wonder if she might’ve been Autistic too. There are other things I vividly recall; like some of the songs we sang, the games we played, the stories we heard, the activities we did, the Christmas tree we decorated. There was always a bigger one put up in the school hall, which every student helped decorate. And in the rare times it was snowing outside in the field or playground, they would actually stop class to let us go out and play in it. Anyway, I think it was when I moved into reception that my Autism started to gravely effect my behaviour. The teachers must’ve known I had it because this was the earliest time I remember having TA support. I’d have several teaching assistants over the years, but the one who stayed with me consistently was a lady called Sue – I don’t know if I ever leaned her surname. Sorry for the pause – I’m recalling the end of Disney Pixar’s Cars when they’re watching car parodies of older Pixar films. Specifically, the one on Monsters Inc. called Monster Trucks Inc. There was also Toy Cars Story. My earliest memories of reception was working on a project based around our field trip to a farm. I wanted to use certain pens for my drawing, but the felt-tips were only for the teacher to use. I think I was so worked-up about it that I wasted all my time complaining and just didn’t draw at all. But it gets worse. Apparently, I was so easily distracted back then I’d sometimes notice a pigeon outside and try to go out after it. In later years, I spat, scratched, was very spiteful, and one time I punched another boy some many times he started bleeding. I set the fire alarm off once – though it wasn’t completely intentional. I’d pee outside behind some bushes – where no one could see me – because I was afraid of going into the boys’ toilets. And then there’s my worst primary school memory. Every now and again the teachers would put on a video for the infants in the school hallway. We’d already watched the whole thing once – I think I might have been an episode of Thundercats – but for some reason they put it on again. And then they stopped it halfway through and I wasn’t happy. In fact, I got so angry that I got up from the floor, ran down the hallway screaming, through some double-doors to the centre of the school, almost ran into some people and then ran back. I’d made such a scene that my parents were called, and I had to be collected from school and taken home. As you can tell, I was a little nightmare. Hang on, I’m thinking of Disney’s Sleeping Beauty and Bambi. And Arthur Christmas. Looking back on it now, I am rather ashamed of how I acted. My Autism just magnified my emotions and made it difficult to read certain situations. There were even cases where my Autism resulted in me getting in trouble at swimming and gym lessons. I will say, though, my teachers had a very good method for teaching me about my bad behaviour; I wasn’t just sent to the head teacher all of the time. If I misbehaved too much in class, they’d write my name on the board. If it got written up there three times then I wouldn’t be allowed to play on my computer at home – which was my favourite thing to do. You might think doing something like this is a little extreme or humiliating. After all – hang on, I’m remembering Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer: The Movie. After all, writing a child’s name up for the whole class to see how naughty they are might be considered singling them out. But to be honest, I didn’t take much notice of what others thought. All I was worried about was making sure I didn’t get three names up there and lose my chance to do what I loved. True, I did lie to my mum somethings about how many names I got. And maybe there were one or two loopholes I found – I couldn’t use the computer, but I still had my Game Boy. However, this method did help me immensely with improving my behaviour over the years. I think later on in the juniors, I might’ve stopped getting names on the board because I was improving so well. I’m thinking of Disney’s The Little Mermaid II – a direct-to-video sequel they released. I also remember one year the Year 6s took on the teachers in a football match. Now I’m thinking of episodes of Mona the Vampire. Anyway, I think if you want to help a young child with Autism improve in school, a method like the one I was given really helps them to think about their actions. Plus, I had mostly the same teaching assistants help me through my many years of primary school. If they have something familiar to latch onto and see them through the major changes in their lives they’ll feel more confident in moving forward. I think what triggered some of my early Autistic outbursts was that everything around me was changing so much. And there were many things I couldn’t wrap my head around. Simple things like having one-to-one support can make all the difference. I wouldn’t say all of my problems were immediately solved. There were still others I had to deal with like bullying, playing and working by myself, and continued bad behaviour. But I would’ve been a lot worse off if it wasn’t for what my teachers did for me. I’m only just realising how much I’ve written at this point. I’ve been very focused on what I’m saying without many thoughts interrupting. Although, saying that I’m now thinking of Disney’s Hercules. I’m almost at 1500 words now. So I’ll continue talking about my later primary school years in a later post. Until then I hope you have a wonderful New Year. Wow – exactly 1500 words!